Well, Hello 2011!

Welcome back everyone!  Happy New Year!  We sincerely hope you all had a happy, healthy, safe and fun 2010 holiday season.  It was a banner year at the GameTime, TBD© household, with the whole family in town for some good, old-fashioned (read: drunk) fun.

And just when we thought we had finally worked off the hangover (apparently you don't recover as fast in your 30s as you do in your 20s . . . getting old sucks . . . but I digress), the Los Angeles Kings go out there and string together five straight losses.  Nothing gets the Chief in a salty mood faster than a prolonged slump by the Kings.  Mix that together with the Chief's re-focused attitude as to weight-loss and training and, well, things have been getting a little tense around the office.  In fact, unless you are an incredibly attractive blond (read: my Better Half), you might want to avoid him until the Kings win one.  On the plus side, we are four weeks away from the Chief's next go at a half marathon, and all signs point to him peeking at just the right time.  But we do not want to share too much right now as you will get all the juicy details in our first fully-original content post of the new year, our annual New Year's Resolution post, which should be up sometime early next week.

Aside from the Kings' winless start to 2011, things have been pretty crazy around the office here to start the year.  Between technical difficulties and actual work blowing up, it has not exactly been the calm start to the new year we had become accustom to around these parts.  Yes, of course this is all code for "short introduction to our first Link Dump of the year", but rest assured we are still bringing you the goods on this, the first of fifty-two Fridays of the 2011 calendar year.  So, we are just going to stop talking (typing?) now and get to the real reason you are here:

• There is nothing like getting the year started with some perfectly-timed sports photos.
• Speaking of photos, this photo pretty much captions itself . . .
• Yes, we live in Los Angeles.  But we still appreciate great sportswriters from other cities; writers like Steve Buckley of the Boston Herald.  That is why we recommend you take a look at his most recent piece.
• Thank you Captain Obvious.
• "The habitually upbeat Carroll became agitated, however, when reporters began to question whether he had a complete understanding of how the playoff system worked, and whether, by extension, he misunderstood the entire structure of the NFL."
• Rounding is a [censored].
• He might be out of football, but Freddie Mitchell still loves him some Freddie Mitchell.  
• Every now and then we try to do something for our female readers, like by introducing them to a real winner.
• Nantz goes up for the rebound and puts it back in.
• Those Russians sure know how to celebrate a victory . . . with vodka, lots and lots of vodka.
• This (attractive) female reporter has been banned from talking smack about CR7 . . . or, at least I think that is what we were supposed to take away from this overly-dramatic female-written soccer blog.  [Editor's Note: chicks . . . (sigh).]
• The Hooters' Golf Tour (yup, a real thing) would kindly like to remind you to not pull a Johnson.
• Not going to lie, we are a little disappointed none of you gave us the heads-up.  I mean, come on, we could have taken these two jagbags.
• We could not decide whether to count this as an article or video, so we decided to put it here as the last link in the article section before moving on to videos (sneaky, right?).  So, if you have some time to spare, here are the "50 Biggest NFL Playoff Fails" . . . video style.

 If you actually clicked on that last link, went through each of the fifty fails, and watched all the videos, we are guessing you are reading this sentence on Saturday.  That is the kind of dedication we like to see around these parts.  If you did not click on that link, or did click on the link and realized it was a little overwhelming (like we did), bookmark it and watch them over the next few days when you have some down time.  I mean, there really is nothing like fifty fails to make you feel better about yourself.  Oh, and speaking of fails:

• It is the best fails of 2010.  You.  Are.  Welcome.
• I know the year is only [counting on fingers] seven days old, but is it possible that we already have our soccer fail of the year?
• And our marathon running fail of the year?
• And since we are on this negative kick (I told you the Chief was headed for a dark place), here are one hundred great movie insults to make you feel better about yourself.
• And here is the coolest fail you will ever see, compliments of the NHL.  [Editor's Note: wow, turrrrrrible pun totally intended.]
• Let us take a turn towards Positivetown with some "sick" whiffleball pitches.
• And some "extreme" shepherding.
• And, of course, there is nothing like a "This Week In Unnecessary Censorship" to bring us down the home stretch.

Once again, Happy New Year!  Have a great weekend everyone!

Who's Watching You?

[Editor's Note: So, it turned out our last Link Dump was (1) hugely popular amongst my Better Half and her friends, so yay for that; and (b) our 150th post (fanfare, fanfare, fanfare . . . trumpets, trumpets, trumpets . . . fireworks . . . grand finale . . . thank you, you're all too kind). But seriously, for those of you who keep coming back week in and week out, I, The Chief, want to thank you for your support. We will keep doing this until (1) you all stop coming around, or (b) I run for political office. It could be a while.]

Finally getting that Kings preview up was like getting the proverbial "monkey off my back" in terms of new, hip, fresh material. I realized I was taking myself much too seriously. After all, it is not like I am trying to win a Pulitzer Prize or anything. So, with this post, it is important you are all in the proper frame of mind. Since it goes with the title, I strongly recommend you have the Geico commercial music playing in the background. This can be accomplished one of two ways: (1) you can let this YouTube video play continuously in the background (don't mistake it for the original please); or (b) you can download the song for free here and put it on repeat in your iTunes (it also makes for a nice song to add to your iPod when you workout at the gym . . . no, this iPost is not sponsored by Apple . . . but it could be . . . hey Apple, call me). I will give you a few moments to get everything ready . . .

. . .

Ready? Good; let us begin.

When the playoffs for any sport begin, you always here radio talk show hosts and television personalities talking about the league's "dream match-up". Take, for example, this year's Major League Baseball playoffs. Everybody knows the league was dying for a World Series in which the Los Angeles Dodgers faced off against the New York Yankees. This is because advertising is driven by viewership, and a Dodgers/Yankees World Series would all but guarantee huge ratings for MLB. It would have the two most storied teams facing off against each other; it would have the Torre, Mattingly, and Manny back to the Bronx storyline. Long story short, it was Bud Selig's wet dream (yeah, I went there). Unfortunately, they got Yankees/Phillies. I do not know about you, but as we head in to tonight's Game 6, I do not even think I have tuned into nine innings total of this year's Series; more to the point, most of the innings I have watched were at the gym. On Monday, I was on an elliptical machine (yes, that's 17 days in a row) right in front of a television showing the Game 5, yet there I was craning my neck to watch the Monday Night Football match-up of the Saints and Falcons. If I had not been trash talking with Q all throughout the playoffs (see, e.g., last week's Link Dump), I probably would not have even watched the six total innings of play that I have up to this point. In fact, I probably will not even know who won Game 6 until tomorrow. Anyone feel like calling me with a heads up?

Moving away from the national spotlight, the Los Angeles sports market is a whole different can of worms. Between sports, Hollywood, the beach, movie premieres, celebrity parties, etc., there is always something for the famous to do. The only way you know your team has arrived in the Los Angeles market is when the celebrities show up for your games. The Los Angeles Lakers are the obvious example. It does not matter what day of the week it is, or what time tip off is, the crowd is going to include quite the who's-who of celebrities. Whether it be Leonardo DiCaprio, Penny Marshall, Denzel Washington, Andy Garcia, Ice Cube, Anthony Kiedis, Dyan Cannon, or, most notably, Jack Nicholson, the crowd at Staples Center for Lakers' home games always has the seen and be seen feel to it. As much as it pains me to say it, the Lakers are the marque sports draw in Los Angeles.

Which brings me to my Kings. You can tell how the Kings season is going not necessarily by the number of people in attendance (the Kings have a very loyal and knowledgeable fan base . . . unlike the Coyotes who managed a paid attendance of 5,855 on Monday in their 5-3 loss to my boys in purple and black), but rather by which celebrities show up. During the Gretzky-era of the early 1990s, the Kings filled The Forum with just as many celebrities as the Lakers. Even during the reign of Murray I, there was a minor resurgence of the celebrity presence, but it really did not happen until later in the season once the Kings were playoff bound. But with the exception of those two time periods, it has generally been uncool for a celebrity to be caught at a Los Angeles Kings hockey game. After all, there are so many other places the rich and ditzy can be photographed by the paparazzi on your average Tuesday.

So here we are, fifteen games into the season, and things are looking good for my boys. They currently stand one point [Update: 3 points . . . stupid Nabokov and his shootout skills] out of first in the Pacific Division and fourth overall (because league leaders get top 3 seeds) in the Western Conference. They also have two players (Kopitar and Smyth) ranked in the top six in league scoring, only made more impressive by the fact that Anze Kopitar continues to lead the league in scoring (11 goals, 13 assists, 24 points). Additionally, Drew Doughty is showing no signs of a sophomore slump (3rd overall in defensive scoring and an increased physical presence) and rookie Davis Drewiske and second-year Wayne Simmonds are ranked in the top ten in the underrated plus/minus category (4th and 8th respectively). To say the least, it has been a team effort thus far. Hopefully they will continue to carry this effort throughout the entire season. They play the Pittsburgh Penguins tomorrow night at home (yeah, I'll be there . . . will you?), which should be a nice test to see just how far they have come. Pittsburgh, after all, is the defending Stanley Cup champion and has yet to lose on the road this season (7-0-0).

So finally we arrive at my main question: who will be watching the Kings, not only on Thursday night versus one of the top teams in the league, but for the rest of the season? I was at the Kings/Blue Jackets game on October 25th (a 6-2 Kings win . . . did I mention they have the fourth most goals scored in the league?) and not only was the game not a sell out, but here are the celebrities I spotted in attendance: Jason Seaver (who looks suspiciously like Alan Thicke . . . and who had a television placed in front of him so he could watch Game 6 of the Angels/Yankees series . . . why even bother showing up Dr. Seaver? I'm sure Mike was off getting himself into trouble with Boner . . . hehehe); "that guy who plays the main werewolf in the Twilight series" (turns out his name is Taylor Lautner . . . if I don't know your name, you don't count as a celebrity); and the biggest celebrity in attendance, Taylor Swift. Really? An eighties' sit-com star, a teen-movie heartthrob, and an country singer? Look, I will admit Ms. Swift is certainly easy on the eyes (your Honor, the defense enters into evidence exhibits 1, 2, and 3), but she is hardly the A-list celebrity that announces a team has arrived here in Los Angeles. In fact, if I did not know better, I would think Mr. Werewolf Boy was simply trying to promote the next installment of the Twilight series and brought his girlfriend along with him, who just happened to be Taylor Swift. That would mean the only celebrity that chose to be there was that Alan Thicke lookalike, and he needed a television to watch a baseball game. This is unacceptable.

The Kings finally have the team I have been waiting for since I first started this blog (*checking date* . . . three years ago? really?) three years ago. This team has already shown they have come a long way and are a legitimate contender for not just a lower playoff seed, but rather one that may come with home ice at least for the first round. And that my friends, is why it is time for us to, once again, pack that building from wall-to-wall. This Kings team deserves to play in front of a sold-out Staples Center (for those of you scoring at home, that's 18,118 fans per game) ever time they take the ice. So I am calling on everyone, whether you are an average Joe or an A-, B-, or C-list (or Kathy Griffin and her D-list) celebrity: put down that grande half-caf skim mocha latte frappucino with an add shot and come support the Los Angeles Kings. There is plenty of room on the bandwagon, but you best be reserving your seats now (don't worry Ms. Swift [*googling Taylor Swift* . . . 19-years-old . . . phew], you can ride shotgun).