I Went Green . . .

. . . and I liked it. As a result of some Friday night plans with the Better Half (which help to kick off my third "Weekend of Awesomeness" in the last five weekends . . . man I need to slow down), it was advantageous for me not to have a car in Downtown Los Angeles today. So, I devised a plan whereby my Better Half would drop me off at a Metro station (which, as it turns out, is not place where a lot of metrosexuals hang out . . . who knew?), and I would take the train into work and then also after work to meet up with her at our destination. So I rode the train (just like the Quad City DJs told me to), read a book along the way, and got to work surprisingly refreshed. Now, I can not say I plan to make a habit out this little adventure (and, if you know the route I had to take, it certainly can be an adventure), but I might have to start doing it every now and then for a nice relaxing morning.

So, we were conspicuously absent last week, and we apologize. For those of you who have been following this site since its early days, you know just how big of UCLA fan the Chief is. So the Chief closed down the office, packed his bags, and flew off to Austin, Texas for the UCLA-Texas game. He swore up and down that he would "finalize the Link Dump from his hotel room Friday morning." Well, that was about as likely as us winning the Mega Millions, retiring, and doing this full time. And who suffered? You, our avid readers. Rest assured, the Chief punished himself severely the rest of the weekend, and was still paying for it through about Tuesday night. And we had absolutely no intention of leaving you hanging for a second week in a row, especially when I am feeling so good.

What has got me feeling so good, you ask? Well, for those of you who have been following this site since its early days (is there an echo in here?), you know how important music is to the Chief. I have an extensive CD collection, spent more money on iTunes than I care to admit, performed for a former-President of the United States and the last General Secretary of the Soviet Union, performed in a nationally-ranked show choir, and, perhaps most importantly, met my Better Half while singing in the Glee Club at Occidental College (this one time, at choir retreat . . .). And tonight, for the first time in many years, I get to revisit where it all began . . . The Phantom of the Opera!!!!! Okay, stop laughing . . . Seriously . . . You are just being rude now . . . Finished? . . . Go ahead, get it all out . . . Okay? Good. Nearly twenty-two years (22?!?!?! Yikes!), my parents took me to see The Phantom of the Opera for the first time; tonight, I see it for the fifth time. Having all-but minored in music in college, I will be the first to admit that Andrew Lloyd Weber does not exactly write the most complex musicals. However, as a young eight-year-old boy, seeing Phantom at the Ahmanson Theatre, was my first exposure to music outside of Mom "rocking out" to oldies around the house and in the car. The lights, the performers, the costumes, the pyrotechnics, and, most of all, the music, left an indelible mark on my soul and introduced me and art form in which I could excel. And tonight, I get to sit back, relax, and enjoy that feeling once again. Only, this time, I get to share it with the person I might not have met but for that performance twenty-two years ago.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa . . . cup check (*clearing throat . . . adjusting pants*). We got a little carried away there with the personal stuff. Sorry about that. You come here for funny anecdotes, a fresh perspective, and stories about sports, not musicals and love. So let us get to the goods:

• First, we ask that you join us in a moment of silence for teenage boners around the world. . . . Thank you.
• Since he is officially divorced, it is no longer cheating. Also, can you blame him?
• YES! We are officially one step closer to ESPN8, "The Ocho".
• Speaking of Ocho, why am I not surprised something like this would happen with Ochocinco's cereal?
  
• Payback is a . . .
  
• Is it mere coincidence the number one recruit in basketball commits to Duke . . .
• . . . the same day this hits the internet?
• A case of "he-said, she-said" where he said the same thing as she said, but the prosecutor has decided to do nothing. In this case, "numerous prosecutors of both genders" ranks right up there with "don't be offended, but . . .".
  
• The hippies win again.
• "Sports don't build character, they reveal it." Well said.
• Our Little Snowflake got hurt playing football. What should we do? Sue the league and coaches of course.
• [*Dialing American Airlines reservations line*] Yes, when is your next flight to Australia? I would like to see what the Gold Coast has to offer.

Since we dropped the ball last week with the Link Dump, and since The Chief is all fired up for Phantom tonight, we decided to give you a double dose of videos this week. First up, we have the usual collection of entertaining clips you have grown to love her at GameTime, TBD©:

• This is one fall release you definitely should not miss.
• I have a feeling it will be a little while before Doug Gottlieb gets a chance to interview Jim Mora (the younger version, not the "Playoffs?" version) again.
• Jamie Pressly can clean my golf balls anytime she wants.
• So, since we dropped the ball last week [Editor's Note: must have been dirty], we have not one, but two "This Week in Unnecessary Censorship" for you.
• I waited a long time for this moment: "The Greatest Reality Television Screw Up Ever".
• Three words: Mike. Tyson. Dancing.

Second, we thought we would drop some musical numbers we recently came across:

• Okay, we did not really come across this one "recently". In fact, it has been here before. But we still love it. [Editor's Note: if you're a Star Wars nerd, raise your hand (*raises hand*).]
• This one too.
• Prep school girls rocking a Dr. Dre classic.
• Yes, I was in a college a cappella group; no, we did not rock out like this. [Editor's Note: language NSFW, so close your door.]
• You want to know why I love music? People like this.

Have a great weekend everyone!

I Swear, I Am Not Crazy

Happy Friday to you all. I hope everyone is surviving this crazy weather we are having . . . well . . . pretty much across the country. At our weekly GameTime, TBD© "staff meeting" this morning it was decided that this will be the second to last official Link Dump of 2009. Apparently, some people were not to thrilled with the idea of trying to put something together for Christmas or New Years. "But what about our Jewish readers?" I replied. Then I discovered when offices close for Christmas, that means everyone stays home. Turns out New Years also falls on Friday. I thought it best to let my "staff" sleep it off that day, rather than putting together some rambling, incoherent Link Dump. So, next week will be the last Friday of 2009 for us to provide you with your weekly does of news and entertainment (it also happens to be the day after the Chief's 29th birthday . . . hint, hint . . .).

Yesterday morning, a nice young man (we'll call him Matt . . . if only because that's what his name tag said) woke up and said "I have to remember to go to my shelf-stocker job at Vons this afternoon." Meanwhile, somewhere across town, it was decided that I would stop and do the grocery shopping after work, while my Better Half spent the day cranking out a take-home (seriously?) final. Now, if you know me (which you obviously do by now), you know that I am a huge popcorn fan (borderline snob). And I am not talking about that microwaveable crap. No; I am talking about the fresh kernels that are popped over an open flame on the stove. Now, back to Matt. Matt went about his day as usual, got work, and began the tedious process of restocking shelves and helping old women reach cans of soup. Then, at about 6:53 p.m. PST, Matt took that fateful turn down the Peanuts/Popcorn aisle, where he ran into me. The conversation went something like this

The Chief: Excuse me, do you know if you have any non-microwave popcorn in the back?
Matt: Whatever we have is already out here.
The Chief: Really?
Matt: [*reaching for bottom shelf*] We have this bag of kernels right here.
The Chief: [*giving the old "really?" expression*] Is that it? You only have Safeway brand?
Matt: Sir, I can assure you the Safeway brand is a quality popcorn.
The Chief: Have you ever had it?
Matt: No.
The Chief: So then, would it be fair to say that you can neither confirm nor deny whether the Safeway brand popcorn kernels are of equal quality to Orville Redenbacher kernels?
Matt: I guess. [*giving the old "what did I do to deserve this?" expression]
The Chief: Okay, well, I know what I am about to say is going to sound like I'm telling you that two plus two equals a bushel of apples, but between you and me, the two are not even close. Write that down.
Matt: I don't have a pen.
The Chief: Well, remember that then. In the mean time, I'll take what I can and enjoy this Safeway brand popcorn to the best of my ability.
Matt: Well, have a nice night, sir. [*giving the old "I hope you get mowed down in the parking lot by that old lady I just helped who clearly shouldn't be driving" look*]

I know what you are all thinking right about now and, yes, it is true, I did direct him to Orville Redenbacher's Wikipedia page in the middle of our conversation. And, to be quite honest, I think that is where I lost Matt. I think I was about to win him over, but that was just a little too far. But at least he learned something at work yesterday, and that is something he can thank me for next time I pacing the Peanuts/Popcorn aisle looking for my Orville Redenbacher popping corn. And since I was nice enough to teach Matt something this week, here are some things to help make you more informed sports fans:

• In the spirit of the Holiday Season, we start with Marisa Miller in the December issue of Access magazine. Have I ever heard of Access magazine? Who cares.
• While the Senate is stuck debating health care reform, the House has moved on to more important things.
• Brian Kelly's former players wish him nothing but success at his new job.
• Tennessee expects me to believe these chicks are not running the spread offense for high school recruits?
• Speaking of hostesses, here is a brief history of their use at various colleges.
• Penbrook will not tolerate Steelers fans in their county . . . oops, nevermind, apparently they forgot about that whole First Amendment thing. Honest mistake.
• Your "Chad Ochocinco is the most amazing professional athlete ever" update of the week.
• Yesterday, there was some tragic news out of Seattle. Brace yourself.
• I am officially considering a career change.
  
• What could possibly go wrong?
• Tracy McGrady has yet to play in a game this NBA season. Keep that in mind when reading this headline.
• "Bonds' agent concedes slugger's playing days are over." Now, who gets to go tell Barry?
• High school volleyball player lets one get past the blockers, gets benched, sues school. Talk about your no-win situation.

Okay, level with me, should I be feeling guilty about last night? No? Good, I did not think so. I mean, I am not being crazy here. Orville Redenbacher versus Safeway brand? There really is no comparison. Good, thanks for the support. Moving on. Here are some clips for your viewing pleasure. Hopefully, you do not think they suck:

• Selection Sunday at the BCS Headquarters went about as well as anyone expected.
• "Well, a bet's a bet." Only the finest live in the South.
  
• Let me see, goalie scores a goal? Check. Goalie runs the length of the field to celebrate? Check. Teammate gets on top of him and simulates sex? Check.
• My lone mention of Tiger this week: the Tiger Woods Anthem.
• I have said it before, and I will say it again: local commercials rule.
• "Why the Internet is Great" reason number 1,763,459: videos like this.
  
• David Letterman sent out his first official tweet this week, as only David Letterman could.

Have a great weekend everyone!