Happy Birthday America!

Long weekends are the best, are they not? You usually get to leave early from the office, and then you get that extra day off, and then the following week is shorter as well. It is a win-win-win in our book. But even with the early departure, we know that work still has to get done. And if work has to get done, that means you all are in need of at least some entertainment to get you through your Friday. Which is why, of course, we here at GameTime, TBD© started our weekly Link Dump.

It is well documented that the Chief is a big fan of the 4th of July. His parties are, well, legen . . . wait for it . . . dary, and, if his invitation to this year's festivities is any indication (it's hard not to get excited for party when the invitation starts "Setting aside the fact the Declaration of Independence wasn't officially signed until August 2, 1776, that ID4 was released to some theaters on July 2 (wait, what?), and Zach Morris voted for Kelly Kapowski over Stacy Corroci at the Miss Malibu Sands pageant, that special time of year is right around the corner." . . . but I digress), we are in for another great one. After all, America deserves to celebrate its 234th birthday in style.

That being said, their are whispers floating around the office that the Chief is not as ready for the party as he usually is, that he is distracted. To those whispering I say, "Well, duh". Everyone knows the lone wild card in the Chief's 4th of July party planning is that July 1st marks the start of the free agency signing period in the NHL. Usually, the start of free agency serves as only a minor distraction to the Chief, just a blip on the radar. But not this year. Everyone knows the biggest name on free agent market is Ilya Kolvachuk, a player who is a legitimate threat to score every time he steps on the ice. He is the type of player the Kings have not had since Ziggy Palffy was in his prime, and the type of player they avoided trying to invest to heavily in during the rebuilding process (which, the Chief readily admits was both frustrating and the right decision). Well, the rebuilding process is over, the Kings are one of the up-and-coming franchises in the league, and for the past week the news has all been about how the Kings are the front runner in the Kolvachuk sweepstakes. Do you know what that kind of hype does to a die-hard Kings fan?

Well, if you were here in the GameTime, TBD© office yesterday, you would have see what that type of hype does. A man who has steadfastly opposed Twitter and a GameTime, TBD© twitter account, was *this* close to opening an account yesterday so that he did not have to keep searching for and refreshing the twitter pages of various NHL insiders. He was following not one, not two, but three live chat feeds for the better part of the day. It was ugly. Worst of all, nothing happened, and we are back at it today. Have you ever tried to get a man to approve a set of links to be published on his blog at a time like this? Mark my words, practically impossible.

But rest assured, dear readers, approve them his did. Of course, that was immediately followed by a string of expletives when Kevin Allan of the USA Today posted "Kings apparently were bridesmaid on Hamhuis and Paul Martin on Day 1. They wanted one of the big name D Men." on his twitter page. Seriously people, we are at DEFCON 2 here; I am worried we may see a grown man cry by the end of the day and we can not say for sure whether they will be tears of joy or tears of sadness. Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and ask, "Is this really my life?" Do not answer that. Rather, just enjoy these things you might have missed from the past week:

• The GameTime, TBD© family would like to send its congratulations (and a video camera) to Kyle Boller, who is marrying anti-gay marriage/pro-solo sex tape family values Carrie Prejean today in San Diego.
  
• Marisa Miller attended the Eclipse premiere for God knows what reason, but at least she looked good doing it . . . and managed to give some oogling teenager his first . . . er . . . "man moment".
• There is a porn star participating in the 2010 World Series of Poker. Insert poke-her pun here.
• It should not be hard to spot the reason this Q&A with Erin Pageviews is getting posted. Here is a hint, it is not because of the pictures.
• Rumor has it we finished a close second in the voting. At least we lost out to one of the best around.
• Only in Canada do parents attempt to profit from their inability to pass along athletic genes to their children.
• "No, you stay classy, anonymous Phish fan who took cell phone pics of a bottomless teenager." [Editor's Note: (1) the girl is of-age, and (b) there is a story associated with the link.]
  
• MLB has found a way to legalize gambling on baseball while also screwing over its fans. Bravo to you, Bud Selig.
• He pulled a hammy doing what?
• Early candidate for "Best Name of 2012 College Recruiting Class" has committed to Tulane; hopes to be drafted by Green Bay.
• "But I feel very comfortable with it and it also helps my physical performance." [Editor's Note: that's what she said!]
• What? No Kobayashi? What has Major League Eating come to? [Editor's note: nice picture choice Wall Street Journal.]

We usually head to lunch not long after the Link Dump goes live, and normally the Chief is very opinionated about where we go. Well, you can throw that out the window today: "I don't care where we go, as long as it has ESPN News on." This from the guy who has been driving the anti-ESPN bandwagon for past two years. NHL free agency, it is fantastic. Speaking of fantastic, here are some clips for your viewing enjoyment:

• It would not be Friday without some vigorous thrusting. [Editor's note: that's what she said (sometimes it's just too easy)!]
• Might as well get our other weekly tradition out of the way now. Here is your weekly dose of mocking of FCC.
• From the YouTube description: "A cinematic study on the social phenomenon that is 'Man Smacks.' The application of 'Man Smacks,' in simple English, allows two men to embrace each other affectionately while preserving their desire to be perceived as heterosexual."
• This will come as a surprise to exactly no one: we are nerds. Thus, we are posting the trailer for the last Harry Potter movie(s). That is all.
• "There are no grenades in Miami." Oh, Jersey Shore, welcome back.
• I will never drive a minivan. Oh, it is a Swagger Wagon? Nevermind then.

Happy Birthday America! Please be safe. Have a great weekend everyone!