I am sure that by now I have built so much suspense, you are on the edge of your seat dying to know what I have planned. For starters, the Ryder Cup is upon us. I know most of you out there are a little confused about that, but I am a rare bread: a golf fan even when Tiger is not playing. For starters, played golf in college; and I am not just talking about on the weekend with my friends, but on my school's team. I mean, this tournament is an every-other-year deal, so when it comes around I have got to pay attention. So tracking today's foursome (kinky!) and four-ball (you know, they can fix that) matches is taking up must of my productive work hours (but clearly, it is not affecting my charming sense of humor).
With my butt firmly planted in a seat on the Dodgers' bandwagon (I won't deny it, when it comes to baseball I'm a fair-weather fan), I am hitting up the Dodgers/Giants game tonight so I can watch Manny being Manny live and in person. But that is only the start of what is going to be an amazing weekend. Tomorrow morning I head up the coast to San Francisco for a short two-day visit with my boys [Editor's note: friends, not illegitimate children]. The weekend will include a round of golf on the uber-awesome Lake Course at the Olympic Club, host of the 2012 United States Open, on Saturday afternoon, and the Lions/49ers game on Sunday (remember, we want Hochuli). Throw in the inevitable night of debauchery, and you can see why I am a little distracted by the upcoming weekend.
But never fear, my avid GameTime, TBD© readers, I would never let a great weekend distract me from helping others in need. So here are some things you might have missed this past week to help you get through your Friday afternoon:
- This is becoming a far too common question here on GameTime, TBD©: How does Matt Millen still have a job?
- Far be it for me to tell a midget how to make an honest living.
- Yes, Idaho, I am sure the cheerleaders' "risque" uniforms were distracting the football team and that is why you lost 70-0. You should do something about that.
- After getting spanked at the 2006 Ryder Cup, here are fourteen-and-a-half reasons why a Tiger-less U.S. team will actually win it this year.
- Speaking of a Tiger-less Ryder Cup, no Tiger means no Elin; and no Elin means these pictures of the players' wives are pretty tame. [Editor's Note: My Better Half recently told me that if I was a professional golfer, we would never have a Swedish nanny. I reminded her that Tiger's wife was not his nanny, but rather the nanny of a fellow professional golfer. I contended that we should be the ones who have the Swedish nanny to introduce to other golfers instead of them introducing me to their's. She agreed. To my yet-to-be-conceived son: you can thank me later; for now, I'll be at the range.]
- Short skirts and tight shirts? How could anyone possibly assume this would be a publicity stunt?
- This just in to the GameTime, TBD© news desk, Syracuse University has learned how to travel through time. Oh wait, sorry, it turns out the athletic department is just retarded; but we knew this already.
- Finally coming to the realization that they can no longer produce an original idea of quality, ESPN turns to ripping people off . . .
- . . . and their summer internships are apparently not that exciting (or the person who wrote this is just a big tool . . . hmm . . . both?)
- The real winner of the USC/Ohio St. game was the counterfeit ticket scalpers. Shocking.
- Ah, Howard Stern, you really know how to class up a tough news story.
- It has been a tough couple of weeks for skydivers trying to find their way into stadiums. (What's better than one angle? Why, a second angle of course. P.S. - Sorry for the lame peanut animations.)
- Something funny on SNL? Must be politics-related.
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