When Fantasy Meets Reality . . .

. . . the Chief folds like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face . . . or something like that.

[Editor's Note: If you missed the Chief's 2011-2012 Los Angeles Kings Season Preview, which went up Tuesday, do yourself a favor and check it out.]

Between Monday and Wednesday of this week, I was asked for my take on the Jim Schwartz-Jim Harbaugh brewhaha roughly eleventy billion times.  Needless to say, it was a perfect topic for the Link Dump introduction.  But by Wednesday I was a little tired of talking about it (yes, they're both to blame; no, it wasn't that big of deal, let's move on . . . oh, and Harbaugh's a jag-bag . . . now we'll move on).  So, I am not going to lie, I was kind of hoping something would come up between then and now that I could talk about instead.

And, as usual, the blog-o-sphere Gods came through in the clutch.

We have often discussed the Chief's "Top 5" here on GameTime, TBD©.  For the uninitiated, the Chief's "Top 5" is a list comprised of the five female celebrities the Chief would have a "hall pass" from my Better Half if the "opportunity" ever arose.  [Editor's Note: Don't worry, she has her list too; we're an equal opportunity household.]  While the list changes slightly from time to time (the bottom two slots usually rotate to the newest "it girl"), the top three have remained the same for quite some time:  (1) Marisa Miller (naturally), (b) today's Link Dump introduction (cliff hanger!!!!), and (iii) Kelly Ripa (I can't explain it, there's just something there).  I am sure our more avid readers already know who our mystery woman is; I mean she has shown up on this site once or twice before.  For those of you who do not, shame on you.

With the Chief desperate for a new introduction topic to magically fall into his lap, imagine what his surprise when, on Wednesday afternoon, not only did a new topic fall into his lap, the topic involved his "Top 5".  On Wednesday afternoon, the GameTime, TBD© office received a tenant notice email from the building managers, as we do from time to time (wow, twice in one post?).  Usually the email is about fire drills, elevator maintenance, protest alerts, lame things like that.  But this email was different, for this email read:

We have been informed that filming for the upcoming movie Underworld IV, staring Kate Beckinsale, will  be taking place this Thursday, October 20, 2011 from 6pm until 6am Friday morning.  The film crew has secured a City permit for the closing of the alley. This closure will affect the parking ally entrance and exit.  Once again the alley will close at 6pm on Thursday and all access to the parking structure will be from Figueroa Street.

If you read past the first line of that email then, congratulations, you got farther than the Chief did.  The Chief was clearly focused on one thing: this woman, number two on his list, was possibly going to be in the alley right behind the GameTime, TBD© offices.  There was an immediate call for an Underwold movie marathon (slightly weird) as part of an office slumber party (slightly more weird) all so the Chief could possibly make a move on a married woman filming scenes for a movie directed by her husband (good luck with that).  Thankfully, the Chief realized that the email did not state she WOULD be part of the filming, so he relented on the plans.  But it should surprise absolutely no one that, all day yesterday, the Chief could "feel her presence", like he was a jedi knight or something.

Now that the night has passed, the Chief is on a mission to verify that Ms. Beckinsale was not here yesterday to put his mind at ease about a "missed opportunity".  So, while we humor the poor guy by going to talk with some of the production crew still cleaning up the alley, here are some stories you might have missed from the week that was:

• Sometimes almost being traded can be a miracle in disguise.  Just ask Jerome Harrison.
• Scam artists posing as famous athletes have been fooling the public for years: a pudgy sex offender pretending to be Vince Young, a petty thief claiming he was Ben Roethlisberger, Jay Cutler posing as an NFL quarterback, etc . . . 
• Looks like Green Bay wide-receivers should have some pretty sweet entertainment centers by the end of the season.
• Allow me to be the first to welcome Bill Simmons aboard the Los Angeles Kings bandwagon.  At least I think that is what he is trying to say in this article about the NHL that seems to be about the NBA.
• What do you get when a newspaper, owned by a church that believed in black racial inferiority until 1978, writes an article about a predominantly black sport? This.
• Dwight Gooden confirms what we already knew/expected about Dwight Gooden.
• "Vegas loves long shots" . . .  except when said long shots are about to cost them some money.
•  There is always someone else to blame, right Charlie?
• Who knew getting drunk and throwing pointy objects at a wall could be so lucrative?  Having already mastered one of those, maybe I should consider a career change.  I mean, how hard is it to throw pointy objects?
• This is why I do not play professional sports.  [Editor's Note: right, that's why . . .]

We like to track our pageview data to see what topics tend to get us the most traffic and, surprising to some, our Kings season preview picked up a decent amount of traffic.  It should be interesting to see how Ms. Becksinsale stacks up (she certainly is stacked) against the Kings when this Dump goes to print.  Speaking of things to see (smooth transition as always), here are some videos to help your Friday afternoon fly by:

• Ever wonder what a squash ball hit 175 mph would do to a guy's back?  Me neither.  Nevertheless, we do now.
• Being the topper that I am, it is safe to say that when my yet-to-be-conceived child (don't want the 'rents to get the wrong idea) is old enough, we will crush this impressive Hot Wheels track.  [Editor's Note: eh, who am I kidding, I will probably do it this weekend.]
• I do not know about you, but I sure hate when someone posts video of me doing an awesome skateboard trick without my knowledge.
• The song in this video is terrible, the brunette dressed up as a referee in said video is not.  That is all.
• It is questions like this that prevent me from ever being able to go on Family Feud.
• Dirt Bike: 1, Random Chick: 0.
• I am guessing that crocodile will reconsider going after the full-grown adult elephant next time.
• Note to self, dinosaurs on steroids are scary.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Fun (?) in the Sun

Well, we are t-minus two days from the Chief embarking on his third half marathon in a little over seven months.  He will be running the Surf City Half Marathon on Sunday down in sunny Huntington Beach, California.  And while he is not necessarily an "elite" runner, the Chief's competitive streak has been well documented on GameTime, TBD©.  So, as you can imagine, he is taking these final two days (a little too) seriously.  For example, a buddy of his who is an avid racer, including an Iron Man, once told him the key to race-day hydration is extra hydration two days prior to the race (that would be today).  So, upon entering the GameTime, TBD© office this morning, the Chief announced he would be peeing clear by noon.  [Editor's Note:  TMI? Probably.  Would you expect anything less from us?  Absolutely not.]  He informed me that today's Link Dump was completely up to me because he was going to "be drinking straight outta the Pure water machine all day."  That is putting a lot of power in my hands.  But, with great power comes great responsibility.  So here we go.

Over the past two Link Dumps, we have featured two of our favorite things as the introduction:  (1) hockey, and (b) hot chicks.  Since then, we have seen hockey viewing and our readership both increase.  Coincidence?  We think not.  And this got me thinking: "How do we build on this momentum?"  By combining the two!  Ain't that right, Boom?  

So it is with great pleasure I present to you, Marry-[Censored]-Kill:  Hockey WAG Edition.  I briefly consider M-F-K: Kings Ice Crew Edition, but realized I did not want to alienate our non-Los Angeles readership.  I must admit, it was both fun and educational preparing this introduction.  For starters, being a WAG (a common acronym for "wives and girlfriends") is much different than being a Puck Bunny; nothing good comes from calling someone a puck bunny.  And, as it turns out, there are a lot of hockey players pulling in top-notch tail.  Of course, some of the top-notch tail is more well known than others, so we focused on those women with more notoriety.  Then we narrowed down the contestants to current WAGs only, no ex-WAGs allowed (sorry Kournikova, you're out).  And after lengthy deliberations (read: Google image searches), we found our three.  So readers of GameTime, TBD©, we ask you, who would you marry, [censored], and kill:  (1) Melanie Collins (ESPN's Pageviews 2.0 and girlfriend of Phoenix forward Scottie Upshall); (b) Willa Ford (singer/model and wife of Detroit forward Mike Modano); or (iii) Carrie Underwood (singer and wife of Ottawa forward Mike Fisher)?  Have fun.

While you debate the merits of these hockey WAGs, we are going to go check on the Chief to make sure his hydration is going well.  And just in case we are not back by the time you finish (hey-oh!), here are some things you might have missed from the past week:

• Askmen.com tells the world something readers of GameTime, TBD© already know:  Blake Lively is hot.
• It turns out the New York Islanders' marketing team is about as good as the hockey team.
• Hope the snow storm did not make you late to last night's Boston Bruins-Dallas Stars game.
• If your office Super Bowl squares do not turn out well (like mine), invite everyone to play a little Super Bowl Bingo.
• "You can make it with some loser you found on the Internet anytime … the Super Bowl is only once a year."  That about sums it up.
• When a quarterback in your league takes illegal funds, you drag your feet.  But when a school dares to use attractive women during national signing day, you take immediate action.  That is the SEC for you.
• Three stars for football skills, five stars for illegal procedure.
• "America, we have laws. Laws against killing, laws against stealing. And it is just accepted that as a member of American society, you will live by these laws. In [Allen], Texas, there is another society which has it's own laws. Football is a way of life."
• Everyone should feel bad for Cal Ripken, Jr. now.  [Editor's Note: here's the card.]
• Sometimes people from the South make it too easy.
• It is still real to me, damn it.

This is your "Hydration Watch 2011" update:  although the Chief still insisted on having his morning coffee, he has managed to consume eight cups of water this morning.  However, we have yet to receive confirmation that his "pee clear before noon" mission has been a success.  We will keep you updated throughout the day as this story progresses.  In the meantime, here are some videos for you to enjoy:

• Your "Sad, But True" fact of the day: we all know someone who does this dance a little too well.
• Who wants to see Bill Simmons have a fangasm over Blake Griffin?  Of course you do.
• I will go ahead and say The Weather Channel is the perfect place for Jim Cantore to be working.
• Speaking of weathermen, let us remember that they are paid to predict the weather, not count.
• What were you saying about injuries?
• In case you "happened" to miss that Croatia vs. Slovakia mens' doubles tennis match this past week, here is the highlight.
• One and done.  [Update: apparently it's one and done for 4-6 weeks...]
• Not the best time to lose an edge there, ref.
• And, of course, no Link Dump is complete without JKL's latest installment of TWIUC.

Have a great weekend everyone!

The Bar Is Open

If you are an avid reader of this fine website (and really, who isn't?), then you know that we here at GameTime, TBD© have generally tried to avoid talking about Tiger Woods and his little "situation". The Chief was of the opinion, and still is of the opinion, that something of that magnitude should not be speculated on. Do we have our theories on what really happened that night? Of course we do. But The Chief said early on that we would not talk about it until we heard something concrete from the source. Finally, we got that today and, now, the bar is open.

First things first: I do not, for one second, believe I ever "knew" Tiger Woods. With all the press and media coverage (whether wanted or unwanted) celebrities, athletes, and politicians get these days, a lot of people begin to feel like they really know all the famous people out there. News flash: you do not. You know what they are willing to show in public. Do not get me wrong, infidelity is a big . . . nay . . . HUGE no-no to me. And yes, my common decency does allow me to feel disappointed that a man who has prided himself character and integrity got himself into such a situation. But Tiger does not now, and never has owed me an apology, and he has never owed one to anyone else other than his family, Elin's family, and maybe some close friends. I appreciate what he said today, and I do believe he was as sincere and sorry as he came across as being, but it is just ridiculous that he even had to hold this press conference in the first place. The only thing I care about hearing from Tiger is (1) when he is returning to golf, (b) how much he is paying Elin to stick around, and (iii) which girl was best (kidding . . . but seriously . . . I'm just joking . . . seriously though . . .).

Which brings me to point two: now that he has had this press conference, there are still some things I am skeptical about:

(1) If Tiger is truly as angry about the rumors/lies he claims people have been spreading, why wait two and a half months to speak up? Clearly, some sort of physical altercation occurred that night, and all signs point to Elin coming out the winner. Tiger can protect her now, then, and forever, but a simple release on his website would have done that and could have done that from the very start. So no, Tiger, I do not believe your teeth look brand new simply because you have had impeccable dental hygiene over the past few months.
(B) You are in therapy (which, don't get me wrong, is great), because you got caught. We are not stupid. If the National Enquirer never runs its story, Elin never goes all Buster-Douglas-versus-Mike-Tyson on you, you are still playing golf, and probably on your second round of skanks, having played through the first eighteen holes. Sure, you may have realized the error in your ways. But have some respect for our common sense. Do not try to make me believe you would have magically come to this realization had you not gotten caught. All celebrities, athletes, and politicians play this card and it drives me nuts. Well, all except one: Michael Vick. He admitted in an interview to DP that, had he not gotten caught, he would probably still be doing the things he was doing. Now that is a man.
(III) I am not trying to open a can of worms here, but was anyone else thrown off by the performance-enhancing drugs denial? Yes, I know a story about PEDs snuck into the press cycle about a month ago, but it just struck me as odd that, in the middle his "I'm sorry I'm a man and I like sex" apology, Tiger would issue such a strong denial and then move on. I am not about to accuse the man of using them (doing so is the third rail of sports blogging), but his statement regarding PEDs really caught me off guard.

Before we get to the reason you are all really here (yes, I've accepted the fact you're here for the links and not my words of wisdom), I have one last thing to touch on. Why is it that only famous people have sex addictions? Or, more specifically, married famous people. Derek Jeter plows through more tail in the average off season than Tiger Woods has in the past few years, yet Jeter is the man and Tiger is in therapy. I understand the obvious point of Tiger being married and Jeter being single; really, I get it. But find me a man who says he does not like sex and I will gladly call him a liar to his face. I am sure my Better Half is going give the business tonight (baZING) about the actual medical side of addictions and why, yes, it is possible, but I can not help but feel a little suspect about the whole thing when the only time I hear about sex addiction is when someone famous gets caught straying from his marriage.

With that, I hope we, as a society (but mostly the media) can all move on now. To show you just how ready and willing I am to move on, here are two three Tiger-related and several non-Tiger-related things you might have missed from the week:

• "Why don't you try reading the rules, Skankapotamus."
• In case you missed it, Tiger had a second press conference immediately after the first.
• Look at that, Bill Simmons did not buy it either.
  
• "Oh, here it is. Bratislava. Hmmm, capital of Slovakia. Oh, here's a fun fact: You made out with your sister, man!"
• Taking a brief time out for a serious note: the GameTime, TBD© family's thoughts and prayers go out to a great NBA coach and his family.
• Askmen.com put together a list of the "Top 10 Las Vegas Sporting Experiences". The list loses all credibility at Number 8, which clearly is Number 1.
• Mark McGwire would like you to remember he is not here to talk about the past.
• Attempted first-degree murder, five counts of arson, assault and battery, communicating threats, three counts of misdemeanor child abuse, injury to personal property, identity theft AND resisting a public officer? [*commencing slow clap*]
• Apparently robbing two people and swimming naked is a crime. Go figure.
  
• No, no Tony, tell us how you really feel.
• It takes a certain kind of person (white trash?) to wear a Cowboys jersey around Philadelphia the week after Dallas knocked the Eagles out of the playoffs; a type of person the TSA at Philadelphia airport would call a terrorist.
• T.O. likes to do his little on thing on the catwalk.
• Ladies, I hope you are ready for the most uncomfortably loud mani-pedi ever.
  

Is it just me, or is it kind of ridiculous how worked up everyone is getting over NBC's coverage of the Winter Olympics? Yes, I understand, for the first time in eight years, everything is happening in a very convenient time zone. But should we not be used to everything being taped delayed? Is it really that big of deal? I knew the results of the amazing 4x100 freestyle relay race at the 2008 Summer Olympics before I saw it, but that did not change how excited I got watching it. Do I wish I could ditch work and spend all day watching the Olympics? Of course, I do. But I can not. And most of the people complaining probably can not either. And to prove to you just how entertaining taped-delayed video can be, here are this week's clips for your viewing pleasure:

• Happy Friday! [Editor's Note: Is that the Sanchize?]
• How on Earth did this song not go big?
  
• Does anyone know when the funeral services are for the staffer who failed to tell Oprah about the birth mark?
• Last week, it was a great moment from The Price is Right. This week: Jeopardy.
• Word to the wise: When a (possibly racist) 67-year-old man wearing an "I AM a motherf****r" t-shirt gives you guff on an Oakland bus, just let it go. [Editor's Note: language is super NSFW.]
• Did you know Johnny Weir has his own television show? UH-mazing!

Have a great weekend everyone!

All Systems Go

Well dear avid readers of GameTime, TBD©, I am happy to report the golf game is in great shape. Admittedly, I fell apart over the final five (5) holes on Monday, but I was exhausted. A man can only swing his club some many times per hole and sixty-three holes in one weekend is a lot of work (that's what she said!). All-in-all, in was a very profitable weekend for my buddy Coop and I, and I am confident my game will be back to where it should be sooner rather than later.

So, with the successful revival of my golf game, I decided to look for other facets of my life that could use a little retooling. The first thing I stumbled across was my physical fitness. It is not like I am terribly out of shape, but I have added a few pounds since the end of summer. That being said, I think my physical fitness level peaked back during my sophomore year of college (9 years ago? Really? Man, I'm old). Money Bags and I were working out in some fashion almost everyday (MB had this diabolical sprint workout he loved to do . . . me, not so much . . . but it certainly made me faster). As I see, every year since then, there has been a small slip in my fitness level. No more. I have officially started "The Streak" (currently standing at 2), which will be the number of days in a row I am able to work out (gym, I'll be kicking your [censored] after work . . . put it on the bulletin board). When the first streak ends, I will simply start a new one, trying to best the previous. Hopefully by Christmas I will be well on my way back to where I want to be.

I have also noticed I have been slipping in the "creative writing" aspect of GameTime, TBD©. You, my passionate readers, expect more out of me and I, quite frankly, have been letting you down. Yes, I know the Kings season is six games old, and my season "preview" has gone through roughly thirty-two drafts, but I will get it to you this weekend. GameTime, TBD© will not simply be Link Dump after Link Dump any longer. I plan on setting aside some time a couple nights per week to write the pieces you have come to expect. So, well I get started on a list of topics to write about (please, feel free to email or comment on topics you'd like to know my prospective on), here are some things you might have missed from this past week:

• We start with Marisa doing what she does best.
• A 5k race series "bringing fitness, beer and flirting together for a big finish line party"? Sign me up.
  
• I have been struggling in my NFL Pick 'Em Pool this year. Hopefully The Sports Guy's week 6 preview can help.
• I know a trap when I see one; so does Michael Vick.
  
• Were you, like me, shocked to discover Michael Sims-Walker was not playing even though you had him in your starting Fantasy Football line-up? He had his reasons.
  
• I do not know what is more interesting, the allegations in this lawsuit or the background of two of the attorneys involved. You decide.
• Baseball likes them young.
  
• Remember when Woodrow Wilson was President? Me neither. But he remembers the last time La Salle-Peru beat Geneseo.
• Chris Bosh now owns the Internet.
  
• Justice, Pitino style: "Any time you defy a police officer, it's serious. They will be punished and are being punished right now. But no, they will not miss game time."
• "Cool heads kept fight from escalating after 'powder puff' contest." Yep, you read that correctly.
  
• I am going to go out on a limb and say he will probably soon be her ex-boyfriend.
  
• Dear Torrie Wilson, Just wanted to let you know such abominations are fine by us. Best wishes, your GameTime, TBD© crew.

Before proceeding to our weekly video selection, a quick GameTime, TBD poll: would you prefer future post only relate to sports, or would you like to see a broad spectrum of topics covered? Think it over, discuss it amongst yourselves, and let me know. In the meantime, enjoy these videos as the rest of your week slowly comes to an end:

• Oh look, Douchey McDoucherson is back. The South must be so proud.
• I have been on an Office Space kick this week. You. Are. Welcome.
• Josh McDaniels is fast becoming the most entertaining coach in the NFL. Do not believe me? See for yourself.
  
• In a strange twist, the boy's friend was arrested for animal abuse shortly after the incident (just kidding . . . but seriously).
• Personal foul, late hit out of bounds, by the skirt. Fifteen yards, to be assessed on the kickoff. Play results in a touchdown.
• Hitler's back, and he is none-too-pleased with Balloon Boy.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Back With A Bang

[Editor's Note: We apologize to those of you who show up every Friday more for the fantastically witty introductions. Today's Link Dump will have a shorter introduction because (1) the Chief was stuck in court all morning and unable to finalize everything in a timely manner; (b) we have more links of note than normal; and (iii) it's the start of a long weekend and we expect that most of you do not need that much entertainment before your inevitable early departure from work.]

On Wednesday, my buddy Pong and I had the following gchat conversation:

Me: So, the college football season kicks off tomorrow.
Pong: Check is in the mail.

With the sports book account re-upped to its normal level, college football season is officially back. Putting my annual quest for supplemental income aside for the time being, it did not take long for the 2009 college football season to get the entire Blogosphere moving at the speed of sound. In fact, all it took was a right cross (and a bad Ali impersonation) from LeGarrette "Roll Me a Fatty" Blount (pronounced "blunt" for those of you not understanding the reference) at the end of last night's Oregon/Boise St. game (I would love to include a link to a video at this point, but ESPN has forced any and all posters of the video to remove it from YouTube . . . so I refuse to link to ESPN's version of the video out of principal). So now everyone from print media, television media, and the blogs is weighing on what punishment should be handed down to young Mr. Roll Me a Fatty. So, I figured GameTime, TBD© might as well jump on the bandwagon and throw in our two cents. After watching the events unfold, then rewinding the DVR and watching them a few more times, we feel: (1) it was nice of Boise St. head coach Chris Petersen to tee up his own player like that; the shot could not have been any easier from Blount; (b) while I do not condone Blount's actions, it does kind of seem like Boise St.'s Byron Hout got what he deserved; and (iii) it is funny that fans are always tough guys from behind the barricade, right up until that point when the player is about to cross over the barricade; suddenly those fans can not flee fast enough.

Does Blount deserve to be punished? Yes, of course he does. Criminally like some people are suggesting? Probably not. I expect that Blount will be sitting out at least the next three to four games, and I will be disappointed in both the University of Nike Oregon and the Pac-10 if it is anything less than that. Considering Blount was suspended by the school during the preseason, I would not be surprised if he was asked to sit out the rest of the season. Especially now that Coach Kelly laid an egg in his first game as a head coach in front of a national television audience.

Well, that is all we really have to say about the topic. More importantly, it is time for us to go make our picks for the weekend. So, while I go figure out what spreads I like (Penn St. -27.5 versus Akron in College Station? Yes please.), here are some things you might have missed to help get you to that long weekend a little faster:

• It looks like I will be seeing a match-up of Top 20 teams next week in Tennessee after all.
• College football sideline reporters are hired based on talent alone . . . talent, of course, being defined as blond hair and a healthy set of sweater kittens.
• A collection of fantastic team photos. Thank you, Deadspin.
• America's Sideline Princess returned to work last night, and Zennie Abraham (who?) is just a little suspicious about the timing of everything.
• If you can read Part I and Part II of Simmons's recounting of his most recent trip to Vegas without making comparisons to your group of friends, well then good sir, you are a better man than I.
• Looking for a way to liven up your fantasy football draft? Here is one suggestion for you.
  
• Having to sign a quarterback just for a preseason game so that your one healthy quarterback does not have to take every snap because he is your team's future? Only the Lions.
• Allow me to introduce you to the scapegoat for the 2009 Dallas Cowboys' season.
• As it turns out, Daniel Synder's bad decisions extend beyond player personnel.
• 2009 has been a great year for the Jagodzinski family.
• Apparently quarterback greatness is not hereditary.
• Headed to a game at Boise St. this season to see the blue turf? Make sure to wear the proper gang colors.
• Please UConn, think of the children.
• I am sorry, they are going to do what?
• When tackling a 14-year-old girl with a gun, recruiters would like you to remember to keep your head up and drive through your opponent.
• Where does Roger Federer stay during the U.S. Open? Why, the Roger Federer suite of course. Wait, what?
• I guess it is time to cross chess off the list of "Things People Do Better When Drunk".
  

We had to throw those last couple links in there to make sure you did not think we spent the whole week reading about football. Oh wait, that is exactly how we spent the whole week. Regardless, we will keep the football to minimum in these clips selected for your viewing pleasure:

• Those guys who make all those videos of crazy basketball shots went to summer camp this past summer. What did they do at summer camp? Made a video of crazy basketball shots.
• Unfortunately, the punching bag Blount used to train for this upcoming season does not make an appearance during this tour of the Ducks' home locker room. Looks like it is tough playing for the University of Nike Oregon.
• Fat chick + mechanical bull = predictable ending.
• Narcolepsy is not something to be joked about. Okay, maybe just this once.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Could You Describe the Ruckus, Sir?

Hello all. It has been far too long. I am sorry for the relative lack of activity taking place around these parts of the world wide web, but my schedule has been absolutely crazy. It still is, actually, but I was not going to let it stop me from taking care of my favorite people (the avid GameTime, TBD© readers) once again. And for a while I bounced around how to start off this week's Link Dump. Do I regale you with stories of my adventures in Point Pleasant, West Virginia (ever heard of the Mothman?)? Or the fact that Vanessa Hudgens loves taking pictures of herself . . . in the mirror . . . without any clothes on (she's 18 right? [Googling Vanessa Hudgens] 20, phew . . . oh yeah, that one's NSFW)? Or maybe I could tease you with details of my upcoming vacation (that's just cruel). But then, as it so often does, life picked the topic for me.

You may or may not have heard (I'm going to guess you have), but John Hughes passed away yesterday at the far-too-young age of fifty-nine. I am willing to wager that there is not a single person out there who does not have at least one Hughes-written movie amongst their top ten favorite movies of all time. Sure, his more recent credits might not be all that impressive, but look at the run he had from 1983 to 1991: Mr. Mom; Vacation; Sixteen Candles; The Breakfast Club; European Vacation; Weird Science; Pretty in Pink; Ferris Bueller's Day Off; Planes, Trains & Automobiles, The Great Outdoors, Uncle Buck, Christmas Vacation, Home Alone, and Dutch. That is an impressive eight-year run. Having not attended high school until the late-1990s, I can not say I appreciated The Breakfast Club, or the other Brat Pack movies, as much as some of my older readers, but they are still great movies. And there is not a week that goes by that I do not follow up one of my far-too-intellectual jokes with "Bueller? . . . Bueller? . . . Anyone? . . . Anyone?" And I will be the first to admit that I will still watch Home Alone when it is on during the holiday, and you can bet that Christmas Vacation is right there for the encore. But I would have to say that Planes, Trains & Automobiles ranks as my favorite John Hughes movie (I knew Rich Eisen and I would be best buddies). It is by far John Candy's best work (sorry all you Who's Harry Crumb lovers) and, if you know me, you know there is not a pre-Bowfinger Steve Martin movie I do not love, and it was written by, perhaps, my second-favorite film/television writer of all time (sorry Hughes family, Sorkin takes the cake).

And while I am sure we could spend the rest of the day debating why we prefer one Hughes movies over another, that is not really why you are here. Obviously the thoughts and prayers of the GameTime, TBD© team go out to the Hughes family, but we are here to make sure you all are a little happier on this Friday afternoon, not bummed out. So to help you get through the rest of your afternoon (and to help me get to vacation a little faster), here are some things you might have missed:

• This countdown alone could kill the rest of your afternoon, but it is totally worth it: The 50 Most Badass Moments In Sports.
• I can not decide if the fourteen points UCLA got in the preseason coaches' poll means they are overrated or underrated.
• Round 1 goes to Delaware; round 2 to the NCAA. But rest assured, Montana is safe.
  
• UCF should know that college football fans take their drunk co-eds tailgating very seriously.
• "I don't know when I'll start again. But I will be the next black quarterback to win a Super Bowl. And I will be in the Hall of Fame." Good to know Vince does not have any self-esteem issues.
• Something tells me that Michael Crabtree will probably not let his cousin speak on his behalf for much longer.
• I do not care if it is $90 or $60, it better be the best pizza ever made for that kind of money.
• The Juice may be loose sooner than expected.
• I have said it before, and I will say it again, the litigious nature of this society drives me mad.
• When the gravy train stops running, a girl has got to earn a living somehow.
• Here is a fine example of second place being the first winner: the view.
• He's a she; she's a he; he's a she-he.
• A new fight for those right-wing freaks that have hijacked my beloved Republican party.
• Although this photo spread has nothing to do with Marisa Miller (or other attractive women for that matter), I promise you, making it through all 20 galleries is well worth your time.

If you have truly taken the time to enjoy all of those links, it has probably taken you about an hour to get this far (I think that is some kind of record for the Link Dump). And for your effort, you deserve to rewarded. While I am willing to wager that only one of these videos' writing rises to the level of John Hughes (heck, two of them are unscripted), I think they are all equally enjoyable and will likely bring a smile to your face (oh, and probably a slight cringe):

• "Those aren't pillows!" (okay, I cheated, Hughes actually wrote it).
• Livin' the dream, baby!
• And he's out!
• Remember when laser pointers used to be cool? Not anymore.
• Still trying to keep you in the Tweet Boxx loop: Episode 5, Episode 6, and Episode 7.
• I am about a week late on this one, but you have got to respect their dedication to Trey (and college rivalries).
• Of course, you can have that last one without this one. [Editor's Note: remember, username: GameTimeTBD; password: gametime]

The GameTime, TBD© office is closed next week; sorry about that. Regardless, have a great weekend (and week) everyone!

Back In The Game

Sorry for last week's lack of a Link Dump (say that ten times fast). Believe you me, there are few things in this world the Chief looks forward to more than a weekend of forced interaction with his entire firm. Anywho, we are back in the game this week.

If you did not notice, the Los Angeles Lakers are back in the NBA Finals. What is that you say? You did notice? My guess is that the eleventy-billion window flags gave it away. Is there anything more annoying than a car with a Lakers window flag? Why yes, a car with a Lakers window flag on both rear windows. Two weekends ago, when I driving home from Palm Springs, I was behind a car that had two window flags on its rear window. Predictably, one of them broke off and hit my car. For a split second, I felt like running the car off the road (not mine, hers . . . it's always women . . . ), but I thought that would be letting the driver off too easy. Instead, I took solace in thought of her reaction when she reached her destination, only to discover one of her beloved window flags had broken off. Probably not a good night to be that girl's main squeeze (though, having seen her, it begs the question: is there ever a good night?).

But more annoying than window flags, is the entitlement complex most fans and the media have about "their" Lakers. They made it this far, so the championship deserves to be theirs; it is as if Boston beating them last year is the greatest travesty of the past twenty years. How are the Lakers not as hated as the Yankees? Lakers fans are just as arrogant. I mean, Orlando has made it this far, why are they not entitled to it? For starters, they clearly have the hotter cheerleaders, and you know that is worth something . . . at least in my book. I know last night's Magic performance does not help my point any, but I do not think Orlando is just going to roll over (I hope). I think they will make a series out of this yet.

Do not get me wrong, the atmosphere in Los Angeles is always great when the Lakers make the Finals, and I hope the Lakers win (after all, I can watch the parade from my office). But lets give the other guys some credit . . . and put away the damn window flags.

So, while I stare out my office window, counting window flags on the passing cars for the rest of the afternoon (if numbers actually go that high), here are some things you might have missed:

• Apparently you can "perfect your game" with Anna Kournikova. I would rather just bid for that date with May Anderson . . . after all, my game is already perfect.
• Twenty-seven points? That is about twenty-seven too many if you ask me.
• Remember those problems with the Phoenix Coyotes we talked about a few weeks ago? Well, I never, ever, ever would have seen this coming. Ever. Shocking.
• Tough decisions must be made in these tough economic times.
• Simmons doing what Simmons does best . . . ball-washing the Red Sox of course. What did you think I meant?
• So, let us see now, looks like all this kid needs to do now is break every MLB record . . . those expectations should not be tough to meet.
• Thankfully Deadspin took the time to (1) track all of SI's "Chosen Ones" and (B) track the moonshot.
• Danica Patrick says what baseball players knew fifteen years ago, takes heat.
• Sosa has hall of fame induction speech all ready to go . . . apparently forgetting that one must be inducted to give said speech.
• "You don't even see that in tee ball." Well played, sir. Well played.
• Memphis probes alleged violations about as well as it shoots free throws.
• I love you Golden State, please [don't] draft me.
• Does that come with a happy ending?
• What are the chances that Brett Favre reads soccer news?

Boy, I do not know about you, but I am still reeling from that Gretzky news (fifty-seven, fifty-eight, sixty). That is just totally unbelievable (sixty-eight, sixty-nine, seventy). Regardless, let us move on to the more important stuff (eighty-five, eight-six, ninety).

• "And the pigeon is no more" . . .
  
• . . . which reminds me, congrats to Randy Johnson on his 300th . . . win that is.
• In honor of the upcoming SBC movie, Bruno, here is one of the best Ali G clips of all time (or you could just go and check out the thirteen greatest Bruno moments from the show . . . slightly NSFW).
• Ouch . . . that about sums it up.
• From the Vault: what is that noise?

I think my favorite part of that Randy Johnson video (one hundred ten, one hundred eleven) is the catcher's reaction. Just watch how he bails out of there.

Have a great weekend everyone (one hundred thirty-three, one hundred thirty-four)!

Slumpbusters

I know you will not be proud to admit it, but I guarantee everyone reading this knew (knows) of their college's slumpbuster(s) (seriously, 50% of my college would have been considered slumpbusters at other schools). Do not play dumb with me and pretend you do not know what I am talking about. So you hit a little bit of a dry spell; your confidence was shaken; you just needed to get back in the game. So you lowered your standards a little bit, ran into someone at a kegger on Saturday night who looked "good" (beer goggles anyone?), and "busted" out of your proverbial "slump". Look, it happens to the best of us (Editor's Note: not me; unless you count my Better Half as my slumpbuster of bad relationships), and, assuming your slumpbuster had some redeeming qualities, you have nothing to be ashamed of (just ignore your friends laughing at you; their turn will come).

But there are other slumps out there that need busting too. The Los Angeles Dodgers were in one of those slumps. Since the Dodgers last won the World Series in 1988, they had won exactly one (1) playoff game in twenty years (a gem of a performance by Jose "Lima Time" in 2004 versus the St. Louis Cardinals). In a city where success is defined by championships, that is a slump. So the Dodgers did what any person in a slump does: go looking for a slumpbuster. They found theirs, however, in the most unlikely of places: Boston. The Boston Red Sox were willing to give up Manny Ramierez for free . . . nothing . . . zilch . . . nada (if you've got an extra half an hour after reading the rest of this, check out Bill Simmons' in depth look at the real villain of the Manny-t0-L.A.-for-nothing deal). Now the Dodgers have a 2-0 lead in their NLDS against the Chicago Cubs (talk about a slump . . .) and are one win away from their first series victory since, well, 1988. It is fun to be a baseball fan again in Los Angeles (and I'm talking about the real Los Angeles, not that fictional Los Angeles in Anaheim).

Well, rest assured that GameTime, TBD© will never find itself in a slump. That is because you, my avid readers, will always be in need of a little Friday afternoon distraction. So, to do just that, here are some things you might have missed:

• With the Yankees and Mets out of the playoffs, the New York Times fills its baseball writing quota with . . . wait for it . . . mowing patterns in major league stadiums.
• Fukudome is not so popular amongst Cubs fans or school administrators.
• Apparently I am not the only one who thought referring to Rays' third-baseman Evan Longoria as Eva Longoria was funny. Unfortunately, Eva Longoria does not find it funny.
• "Hey baby, I'm just calling to let you know that the Restraining Order you got against me just went through about 20 minutes ago."
• I guess it was only a matter of time before fantasy football scoring pushed someone over the edge.
• It is good to see Shanahan finally joking about his long standing feud with Al Davis. But did he really count all of the days? I am not positive, but I am pretty sure the Broncos have a game this weekend. Can anyone confirm that for me?
• "Luongo to lead the way from the rear." Sometimes these things write themselves.
• Apparently, newspaper are cutting back on their coverage of local hockey teams. Those of us who have read articles written by those who cover the Los Angeles Kings think this might be a good thing.
• I think I will parlay "AFC winning the coin toss" with "Born to Run" for this year's Super Bowl.
• While some were sad to learn the Golden State Warriors had to fire their mascot (thanks to the Seattle Supersonics . . . wait, they moved? To Oklahoma City? When? Huh, who knew?), this guy is clearly not one of them.

Seriously though, that last guy has some unresolved anger issues he needs to take care of before things spiral out of control for him. Maybe he needs to go find dad and let him know he understands and he forgives him. Or, maybe these three videos I have selected for your weekly viewing pleasure would help:

• Carey Price obviously took the red pill.
• Gravity 1, Roof Surfer 0: gravity's best punchline in years.
• Even with all of this economic turmoil, apparently it still feels good to be a banker. How good you ask? Damn good.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Back in the Saddle

Check . . . check . . . check 1. Sibilance . . . sibilance. Check . . . check . . . check 2. Sibilance . . . sibilance. Okay, good. It looks like we have everything back up and running. It is good to be back in the saddle of GameTime, TBD©. I apologize that I had to go dark for such an extended period of time.

I was finally able to make an honest woman out of my Better Half and what does she do? That is right, she "forces" me to go off and spend two weeks with her in French Polynesia (Tahiti, Moorea, and Huahine). Oh, the humanity. I do not know how I survived two weeks of lounging around in the sun with a beautiful woman, drinking beer, without a care in the world. Oh, and my wife was there too (sorry for the obvious joke, I'm a little rusty). French Polynesia is truly a beautiful place; we did not want to leave. Take my advice, if you are planning a vacation and want to go someplace tropical, you can not go wrong with the Society Islands.

So after two great weeks, I was relaxed and in a good place physically, mentally, and emotionally, and I was ready to get back to my responsibilities to you, the avid GameTime, TBD© reader. Well, unfortunately it only took work about .01 seconds to knock those good vibes right out of me, a feeling I know to which Milorad Cavic can totally relate. I never realized how much work can pile up on a desk in two weeks. And while I still have a few piles to get to, I was not going to let work keep me from finally getting back to something I love so much: GameTime, TBD© and its weekly link dump. Sure, I might have taken a little detour to the UCLA-Tennessee game; had a chance encounter with my hero, Dan Patrick (I haven't washed my right hand since Monday); sat through two fantasy football drafts; and made a few wagers on college foo . . . err . . . I mean . . . found a source of supplemental income, but here I am, back in the saddle and ready to let you know about some of the things you might have missed over the past week:

[Disclaimer: with the start of college football and the NFL, all of this week's links are related to football, and I'm not talking about that strange style of football they play in Europe.]

• In preparing for the Detroit Lions' season, I discovered that things might be looking up . . .
• . . . but then I remembered that Matt Millen is still our team president . . .
  
• . . . and our new runningback's underwear was stolen by the guy he is replacing. Oh the joys of being a Lions fan.
• FanIQ dares to ask the question: which cheerleaders are better, NCAA or NFL? (Though I question FanIQ's choice of the USC Song Girls as California's representative as opposed to GameTime, TBD© favorite Brianna and the UCLA cheerleaders.)
• Under the category of "shocking", Tennessee fans are not too pleased with phat Phil.
• Two stadiums, eight miles apart; its a fifty-fifty chance that the skydivers pick the right stadium. Let us see how it turns out.
• I used to idolize The Sports Guy; he is after all the reason I started this blog. But then he kind of got too big for himself and lost touch with who he really is. It is nice to see him return to form, if but only for a minute, in his NFL predictions.
• And what would football season be without mentioning Ryan Leaf? After reading this article ask yourself this: do I feel better about Ryan Leaf or sorry for myself?

As for your viewing entertainment, I am taking a risk and blending sports with politics. Okay, I guess it is not really a risk since sports and politics have mixed well for many years now. So, in honor of my party choosing a former-sportscaster as its vice-presidential candidate, here are some great moments in sportscasting history, with a little weather mixed in for fun:

• There is a theory that, in this day-and-age, once something is put on the internet it can never be completely destroyed. Therefore, my sincerest apologies to the Republican Party; try as you might, this Sarah Palin sportscast is not going anywhere. And trust me when I say, we are all better off because of it.
• Somewhere my Better Half is laughing because she knows I probably would have reacted the same way.
• Your first time never goes the way you dreamed it would.
• Brian Collins would like to remind you that "Boom Goes the Dynamite".

It really is good to be back. We will get the ball rolling on some new original content here shortly. In the meantime, have a great weekend everyone!

While I Was Flying

Once again, I found myself traveling on business all week. I must say, it is hard to keep up with the daily going-ons of the sports world when you are living out of a hotel room for a week, using your travel budget to buy drinks for you and all of your college buddies. I was, however, able to keep up fairly well this week because I take my responsibilities as Editor-in-Chief and Lead Writer for GameTime, TBD© very seriously and I did not want to let you all down this week.

Because I was away, I have yet to have a chance to put together my thoughts on the Los Angeles Kings' firing of Marc Crawford. While my previously-mentioned college buddies and I were watching game three of the NBA Finals, my eyes were drawn to the sports ticker announcing Crawford's untimely departure. Rest assured, I have my fair share of opinions on this recent development and the comments that have been made by the organization since then. And rest assured that those opinions will find there way to GameTime, TBD© sooner, rather than later.

Speaking of the NBA Finals, what happened to the Lakers last night? I was enjoying dinner and some drinks at the airport before my flight, watching the Lakers build a comfortable eighteen-point halftime lead. By the time I boarded the plane, flew from San Francisco to Los Angeles, and turned on mu CrackBerry, the eighteen-point lead had turned into a six-point loss. Now that is impressive. I hoped to get the low down from Kurt at Starbucks this morning, but he was nowhere to be found. So, while I try to figure out what I missed during the second half of last nights game, here are some things you might have missed:

• Speaking of Lakers-Celtics game four, Bill Simmons certainly did choose the right game for one of his famous running-diaries.
• Oh, and there is something going around about a Laker Girl who used to be a Celtic Dancer. What, was she traded for three pairs of hot pants and a sports bra or something?
• Oh, and if you have a couple extra tickets to game six in Boston, this guy is willing to offer you his wife. Stay classy Celtic fans.
• And since we are talking about Boston, a GameTime, TBD© congratulations goes out to Big Papi on becoming an American citizen. I guess that just makes him Big Daddy now.
• My invitation must have gotten lost in the mail or blocked by my spam-filter.
• If you see a decidedly un-athletic-looking character parading around town with a Giants Super Bowl ring — and it's not Eli Manning — please call your local authorities immediately.
• Pop Quiz: What does eight earned runs on three hits earn you?
• Hey taxpayers of New York, I know times are tough, but would you mind giving me $400 million?

Before I present to you with your clips for your Friday viewing pleasuring, I would like to remind you that quality is more important than quantity. That being said, here are two videos that best sum up how Laker fans are feeling today:

• What would we do without replays? (listen with sound if possible).
• I knew there was a reason I never got into skateboarding.

Have a great weekend everyone!