Dear God, It's Beautiful!

[Editor's Note: the title of this post is to be read like this, not like you're in a church service.  That is all.]

College football started last weekend, the NFL officially kicked off last night, the NHL returns in a month, and it is still bikini season in Southern California.  Life.  Is.  Good.

Another little-known highlight of this time of year is watching the Chief's great debate over fantasy football.  I am not talking about him agonizing over which player to draft when (to be honest, I've always been impressed with his "just tell me who's been injured and I'll go from there" attitude when drafting).  No, the Chief's great debate is always over how many leagues he should join.  It is comical.  Every year around early-August, the first invite comes in and, invariably, the Chief announces "I'm cutting back this year; it's time."  So, it is time for us to ask the question: Chief, how did that "cutting back" go this year?

Survey says . . . [click].

On Wednesday, the Chief entered the GameTime, TBD© offices with quite the serious look on his face.  Asked what the problem was, the Chief merely shook his head in disgust and responded "I just agreed to join a sixth fantasy football league."  You read that right, his SIXTH (6th) fantasy football league.  So much for cutting back.  To be fair, up until Tuesday, the Chief had done a mighty fine job of limiting himself to the four leagues he considers most important: (1) the sixteenth season with his high school friends; (b) the big money "actual work" league that he has dominated for four years; (iii) a keeper league with GameTime, TBD© regulars Moneybags, Ballgame, and the rest of the extended-college crew; and (4) a league full of jackasses (true story).  Little did the chief know that, on Wednesday morning, Grantland was going to introduce the world to a new type of fantasy football:  The Bad Quarterback League.  I kid you not when I say that, within minutes of that article being posted, the Chief's email and gchat exploded with invitations to join a Bad Quarterback League ("BQL").  How could he possibly resist a new type of league?  I will not lie, the fact he was able to limit himself to only two BQLs is a bit of a miracle in-and-of-itself.  But, nevertheless, here we are, one day into the 2011 NFL season and the Chief is juggling six different teams.  Come December, the Chief is either going to be rolling in the dough, or having that awkward conversation with My Better Half about why her Christmas gift is going to be a little smaller than normal.

My oh my, it is going to be a stressful season for the Chief.  But if there is one thing you know to be true, the Chief will never root for a player when facing his beloved Detroit Lions, no matter what is on the line.  So, while help the Chief sort through his various rosters and make those final starting line-up decisions, here are some things you might have missed to help get you through your Friday afternoon:

• This one goes out to all of you who are (1) fans of the Lions, and (b) fans of an attractive woman wearing practically nothing.  [Editor's Note: is underboob considered NSFW?]
• If you have not heard (what, do you live in a cave?), the Chief's man crush is missing a game for the first time in his career . . . and that is a tough break for Rick Reilly.
• Arian Foster might not care what you think about his fantasy stats, but the NFL certainly does.
• Do not know which teams to bet on this weekend?  When all else fails, look to the WAGs.
• Just when I thought you could not possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this . . . and totally one up yourself.  Thank you, Canada.
• Women set record for world's longest hockey game.  Ten days long? Man, that is a lot of periods.
• Ah yes, the old "Do you know who I am?" defense.  Never seems to work out like you expect it to.
• "Should Notre Dame's Coach Be Fired for Cursing?"  Yes, you read that correctly.
•  Your sports-related "Good Samaritan of the Week" award goes to these two college football players.
• Which, naturally, leads us to our sports-related "Not-So-Good Samaritan of the Week" award . . . look at that face, is anyone really surprised?
• Speaking of faces, look at this face.  It screams cheater, does it not?
• Single and ready to mingle in England?  Here is hoping that the two percent of your population that looks good in lingerie are also Newcastle United fans.

As if I did not feel bad enough for England already.  First they had to deal with the heartbreak of the Chief declining duel citizenship when he turned eighteen.  And now comes word that only two percent . . . TWO PERCENT . . . of their population looks good in lingerie?  Ouch.  Well, at least we have a collection of videos for you that look in anything and everything.  I guess things are looking up for our English readers:

• The Onion Sports Network prepares you for the first week of NFL action as only the Onion Sports Network can . . . with rape jokes.  Yikes.
• To help the Chief make it through the first week of football without Peyton Manning since 1998, here are three of his favorite Manning commercials:  (1) laser-rocket arm, natch; (b) oh, CUT cut; and (iii) taking a hike.
• New Era is almost making me want to buy hats again, thanks to its Rivalry campaign, which has now brought us John Krapulewski and proof that 9-1-1 for rich people actually exists.
• You would think getting to bang Brooklyn Decker whenever you want would give you a cheery disposition, no?
• Soccer fail?  Soccer fail.
• Who knew BMX biking was so exciting?  Apparently these guys.

Before we bid you all adieu, we wanted to take a moment to remember all those lost ten years ago this Sunday on September 11th, 2001. The Chief was unable to come up with any words he deemed worthy enough to honor those who died on that, so he decided to add one extra video to this week's Link Dump.  It is the opening moments of David Letterman's first show after the events that have changed our country forever.  We remember those who lost their lives and give thanks for those who managed to survive.

Please, have a great weekend everyone!

Worst. Relationship. Ever.

You know what a city with already ridiculous traffic congestion could really use this morning?  A visit from the President.  As such, things are running a little behind schedule this morning at the GameTime, TBD© offices and that always gets the Chief a little antsy.  But rest assured that we are operating at full capacity and are to send you off into the weekend on the right foot.

I was talking with long-time friend of the program Q early this week, and she was a little (read: a lot) distraught over her Phillies' lack luster performance in Game 4 of the National League Championship Series.  And as a tried to talk her off the ledge (trust me, as a Kings, Lions, and UCLA fan, I have plenty of experience in this area), she said something that really got me thinking: "Being a fan . . . it's like being in a relationship.  Like a complicated one.  When it's great, it's GREAT . . . when it's bad . . . oh man."  My initial response was that that was the perfect analogy.  But the more I thought about, the less I was convinced.

Let us be honest, we all have been stuck in a bad relationship at some point in our life.  [Editor's Note: if you ever want to feel better about your bad relationship, talk the Chief and you'll feel better . . . trust us.]  It is that relationship that is well past its expiration date but for some reason you keep going back for more.  It is that relationship that your friends keep begging you to end, but for some reason you do not listen to them.  You have to put in all the effort; you have to pay for everything; then, at the end of the day, you are not even sure if you are going to get any.  Did I describe your bad relationship?  Probably.  Did I also describe what it is like to be a fan?  You betcha.  Perhaps our good friend Ballgame summarized it best when he said "It's like the girlfriend who is so incredibly awesome at making out, you stick around for all the torture, just waiting for the big payday that never happens."  Does that sound like a complicated relationship?  No, that sounds like the worst. relationship. ever.  Yet here we are, still waiting for that payday that might never come.

The more we talk about this, the more we risk the Chief having some sort of 'Nam-like flashback.  Believe you me, they are never pretty.  So, I think it best we switch gears and get to the good stuff.  Here are some things you might have missed from the past week:

• I can not decide what I like more, the old guy stealing second in public or the reaction of the guys trying to document it all?
• Tiger says he is finally "at peace" with his life because . . . you know . . .  now he does not have to be worried about a wife finding out.
• Here's to you, (former-King) Matt Moulson.  A true class act.
• When I win the lottery tonight, I am buying this.
• Sasha Vujacic has certainly out-kicked his coverage.  Good for him.
• Please, Commissioner Stern, think about the agents, the entourages, and the baby mamas . . .
• MSG's loss is our gain.
• Headed to the Big House for a Michigan game?  Do not forget to pack your M16s.  
• Colts punter seeks to become the Peyton Manning of public intoxication.
• Did you win your fantasy football match-up this week because of Chris Johnson's late touchdown?  Well, apparently you have ESPN's greed to thank for that.
• Speaking of ESPN, this is the kind of publicity they always seem to love.
• Oh, wait, you strenuously deny the charges? Oh, well you must be innocent then.
• Peruvian soccer team takes the phrase "win at all costs" to the next level.

Before we get the videos, a funny story.  As we mentioned at the start of the Link Dump, the President is in Los Angeles today.  His first stop is a rally at the University of Spoiled Children here in downtown and then he has a radio interview in Glendale.  Since many of you are probably not up to date on the layout of the Los Angeles freeway system, you should know that there is only one freeway that gets you from downtown to Glendale and the surrounding area.  Well, that fact has made it quite convenient for not one, not two, not three, but six attorneys in my office to feel as though they should beat traffic and "work" from home this afternoon.  But do not fear, we know that many of you will not be bailing out early.  So here are some videos to help get you through your Friday afternoon:

• No one disputes that Rick Rypien was wrong in grabbing at a taunting fan. No one except the homer Vancouver announcers, that is.
• This seemingly innocent compilation of footage captured by sports fanatics will probably give you the sudden urge to buy rugged cameras, skateboards, snowboards, surfboards, race cars, and motocross bikes. I would warn you more, but I have stunts to practice.
• "Lincecum, [censored] yeah!"  You know, if we are not careful, people might start to think we like the Giants as well.  [Editor's Note: We DON'T! Also, video's language is NSFW.]
• Sadly, this will be the highlight of Pepperdine's basketball season. 
• Wait, this is an ad for a motorcycle insurance company? Weird, I thought it was for a new women's body wash.
• When the robots finally rise up against us, at least we will still be able to out bowl them.
• Mad Lib time: "It's been another wild season of fist-______ and hard _______ . . ."

Have a great weekend everyone!

Full On Double Awesome All The Way

[Editor's Note: if you don't get the title, you don't remember some of the best stuff this site has provided you. You should be ashamed of yourself. But, because I'm a nice guy, here it is again.]

There is nothing quite like the Friday before a holiday weekend. For all we know, our avid readers could have decided to skip town early. Why have a three-day weekend when you could make it four? Regardless, we do not do this just for our avid readers. We created GameTime, TBD© to make the world [wide web] a better place, one post at a time.

Not to brag, but I can not even begin to tell you how awesome this weekend is going to be . . . but do not think that will stop me from trying. So awesome is this weekend going to be, I think it deserves a name. Henceforth, Labor Day weekend 2010 shall be known as the "Weekend of Awesomeness". [Editor's Note: Wow, someone drank the creative juice this morning.] When bestowing on something a nickname as awesome as "Weekend of Awesomeness", some explanation is necessary. Allow me.

The first, and perhaps most obvious, reason this weekend is going to rock: the return of college football. For all intents and purposes, my Better Half has the next fourteen Saturdays all to herself. Thankfully, she will choose to spend some of those Saturdays with me, and not bankrupting our family on an entirely new wardrobe and hanging out with her best girlfriends, but for the most part I will be spending my Saturdays (1) glued to the couch, (b) at the Rose Bowl, or (iii) both (1) and (b) between now and the first week of December. Try as she might to convince me to do something else [Editor's Note: oh, she has her ways . . .], I need only point to section II, paragraph 4, sub-paragraph (G)(ii), clause 5 of our only slightly technical prenuptial agreement, which I am confident she read as thoroughly as our Congress reads legislation before voting on it, that states: "the Better Half hereby agrees that, beginning with the first week of college football season and lasting until the later of (1) UCLA's last game or (2) the National Championship game, the Chief shall be excused from performing any and all marital duties on each and every Saturday during the above defined period and any and all necessary travel days to accommodate UCLA's football schedule . . . ." It, of course, goes on to list the penalties for violation of this provision, but there is no need for bedroom talk here. [Editor's Note: If only Frank McCourt had asked me to draft his Marital Property Agreement . . . but I digress . . .] So if you need to reach me on a Saturday over the next four months, you should probably just try to get in touch with my Better Half instead.

The return of college football, while enough to make this a "Weekend of Awesomeness", is not the sole reason we are amped for this weekend. In fact, I will be taking my UCLA watching on the road to Chicago, to hang out with my Better Half and BFF. If you have been to Chicago, no further explanation is necessary. If you have not, well, sucks to be you. We are taking the red-eye out tonight and will be spending the weekend hanging with the BFF, her boyfriend, and her adorable baby girl. Throw in rubbing elbows with some professional athletes [Editor's Note: MLS players are considered professional athletes, right?], staying with Agman and his wife, and fulfilling one of my life-long dreams of finally getting two chicks in bed at the same time to see a baseball game at historic Wrigley Field, and you can see just why Labor Weekend 2010 is the official "Weekend of Awesomeness".

Regardless of how awesome my weekend is going to be (did I mention it's going to be awesome?), we still have to get through the rest of this Friday together. So while I go make sure I have all my travel documents ready, here are some things you might have missed to help you pass the time:

• This is not the first time Rachel Uchitel has been black-balled in the past year. [Editor's Note: Hey-OH!]
• It is good to see that the Nitty Lion mascot is already in mid-season form.
• Instead of the normal cupcake opponent that many major schools schedule for the first week of the season, LSU gets UNC's second team.
• If you are attending the Colorado-Colorado State football this weekend, make sure you leave the sizzurp outside.
• This kid's dreams of earning a Division I football scholarship end on account of being an adult.
• I feel like a 2.5 karat diamond would stick out on a football field, no?
• No, no Terry, tell us how you really feel.
• Did not respond to the lawsuit? I would have thought its lawyers knew "truth" is a defense to a libel claim.
• Gary Bettman wants players to stop accepting those ridiculous deals being offered by his GMs and owners. Cause, you know, it is the players' fault.
• "Well I can think of three things I'd like to do. One would involve some ice cubes and a nine iron. Two would include a buffalo, live or stuffed; preferably stuffed for safety sake. And three, we bring back some of those ice cubes and switch it over to a pitching wedge [and throw in a 25-acre fire.]"
• Here is a story for all you golfers to remember the next time you "forget" about that ball you hit out of bounds.
• Kid Rock is still alive? AND singing?
• When people have too much time on their hands, *stuff* gets weird.

Still with us or totally jealous of how awesome our weekend is going to be? Look, it is only natural. We do not blame you. So, to help ease the pain, here are some videos to help you get throw those last minutes of your pre-holiday-weekend Friday:

• One good Billy Madison reference deserves another.
• We are suckers for any sort of trick-shot compilation. This week? Super Cool Bowling Awesome.
• A lot of people felt the need to get punchy this week [Editor's Note: we can neither confirm nor deny they heard about the "Weekend of Awesomeness" immediately prior to the events you are about to see]: (1) finally, an MLB fight that does not suck (Gaby Sanchez, for the win); (b) mullet-wearing fan of "the U" believes he can fly (Spoiler Alert: he can't); and (iii) New York tool versus the rest of the U.S. Open crowd (who you got?).
• Sean Penn goes between two ferns.
• Is Roger Federrer the new Peyton Manning of commercials? [Editor's Note: Don't you dare talk about my man crush like that; Roger Federrer will never match this, this, or this, just to name a few.]
• Epic. Football. Fail.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Happy Holidays To All . . .

. . . and to all a good night. I know that is not the exact quote, but we try to keep things politically correct here at GameTime, TBD© and we like to think we have attracted a diverse readership. That would mean not everyone coming across our little corner of the World Wide Web celebrates Christmas and we are fine with that.

This here is our last official Link Dump of 2009, and that means it is the last official Link Dump of the first decade of the twenty-first century. I am sure you all have noticed the gluttony of "Top __" lists floating around the Internet over the past month or so, all relating to what the biggest deals of the last decade were. If you have come looking for our "Top __" list of the decade, we are sad to say you might be a little disappointed. For starters, the Chief has not decided if it would be too cliche to write up a list of things that happened over the past decade. He is still going back and forth on the whole idea.

We had hoped to get a final answer from him this morning, but . . . well . . . yesterday was his birthday and a long lunch with some colleagues and a dinner with more than a few glasses of wine have left the Chief moving a little slow this morning. In fact, on several occasions we have had to poke him just to make sure he is alive. Turns out he is. The Chief has vowed to live his last three hundred and sixty-five days of his twenties to the fullest, and he certainly appears to have kicked it off with a bang. Good big or go home, that is what the Chief always says, and it is amazing he has not learned to regret those words. We think, however, his mission is more driven out of the fear of actually turning thirty than just actually enjoying his last year of the twenties. So we are turning to you readers who may have already turned that corner, or those who are familiar with someone who has, for a little advice. Should we be worried? Are there any signs we should be looking for that might indicate the Chief is falling off the rails a little bit? Is there anything we can do to make the transition smoother or do we just let him run head first into his thirties like he used to do with cupboards as a child? [Editor's note: true story . . . explains a lot.] Nothing is off limits right now. We love our Chief and we want to make sure he is primed and ready to make his thirties just as great as his twenties. [Editor's note: I think we've just found our "Top __" list, The Top __ Things of the Chief's 20s . . . check back early next week when you're in the office doing anything and everything you can to NOT be working.]

So, we are off to go poke the Chief yet again and start collaborating on this list about his twenties. This can only go one of one ways: UH-MAZING. In the meantime, here are some things you might have missed from this past week:

• Marisa Miller backstage at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show certainly gets me in the holiday spirit.
• Tiger gets support from the one guy he was hoping for . . . I think . . . probably not.
• Did you know Tiger has been on the front cover of the New York Daily News for twenty straight days? Do you know the last time that happened? 9/11. Between the pending divorce and this, I am willing to wager his streak will not end anytime soon.
• My Jimmy Schwartz is trying to motivate his Kitties the old fashioned way: telling them they suck.
• Mack Brown got a small raise recently and [*gasp*] the rest of the Texas faculty is not too happy about it.
• At this rate, I would not be surprised to see the Alabama government declare Marshall Law for a week. God bless my Alabama brethren.
• Speaking of lawyers and the law, here is your legal lesson for the day: eminent domain.
• Dear Juan, In recognition of your hard work in keeping us alive while Manny was out, we are sending you to Chicago for no one in particular. Xoxoxo, The Dodgers. P.S. Happy Holidays.
• Missouri basketball players get all punchy with a Missouri cheerleader . . . but it is not like you think.
• Screw you guys, I am going home. Ah, ah . . . screw you . . . home.
• I have heard of a lot of strange things happening during workouts, but this takes the cake.

Since it is the Holiday Season (capitalized? not capitalized? who cares), we thought it would be best to go with (almost) all holiday-themed clips. If these do not get you in the mood for a great Christmas (if that's your thing), then I do not know what will.

• Gift ideas from the Chief's man crush? Priceless.
  
• Tiger finally clears the air. [Editor's Note: STRONG language.]
• If only all Christmas shopping was this fun.
• "Second, there are, like, thirty Ray's Pizzas. They all claim to be the original. But the real one's on 11th. And if you see a sign that says 'Peep Show', that doesn't mean that they're letting you look at the new toys before Christmas."
• To this day, it remains the greatest gift idea ever. [Editor's Note: remember, username: gametimetbd@gmail.com, password: gametime]

From "all of us" here at GameTime, TBD©, we wish you and your family a happy, healthy, and safe 2009 Holiday Season.

The Way We See It, Eh?

If, much like the fine folks here at GameTime, TBD©, you are a dedicated Starbucks drinker (dedicated, addicted, what's the difference?), you have undoubtedly seen the "The Way I See It" quotes printed on every cup. Normally the quotes seem random and unrelated to most things that happen in every day life. But not today. Today, on a "grande in a vente" cup, the following was written: "There is a subtle difference between a mission and a promise. A mission is something you strive to accomplish - a promise is something you are compelled to keep. One is individual, the other is shared. When a mission and a promise are one and the same . . . that's when mountains are moved and races are won." The quote came from President and CEO of Susan G Komen for the Cure, Hala Moddelmog. While I do not equate what I am about to tell with curing cancer, it is a good story nonetheless.

A "close friend" of the GameTime, TBD© family went and got himself/herself a ticket for running a red light, you know, one of those tickets issued by a video camera. Well, he/she approached the Chief and asked if he could help him/her out with fighting ticket. Like any good attorney, the Chief promised to do so. After reviewing the evidence, it became quite clear that this "close friend" did in fact run the red (no matter how many times "close friend" argued it's a judgment call, much like instant replay in the NFL). The Chief thus made it his mission to find a way to still get his "close friend" out of the ticket. So the Chief dug in and, like a good attorney (because he is one), sought out a way to get the evidence excluded so that the State would not be able to carry its burden of proof. The Chief thinks he came up with a pretty compelling argument and that the "close friend" should be getting out of the ticket. Of course, the Chief spent way too much time on this simple proposition -- performing research, contacting City officials, obtaining copies of contractual agreements, etc. -- but it was his mission, and he was going to do what ever it took to move that mountain. We will let you know what happens with the case, but you should know that the Chief does not lose very often when it comes to a legal battle (Lawyered!).

The way we see it, here are somethings you might have missed:

• Let us start things off right this week: Marisa Miller photoshoot.
• NHLPA seeks winter break so players can relive the classic college tradition of hooking-up-with-that-girl-from-high-school-who-used-to-ignore-you-but-now-thinks-you're-cool-because-you're-in-college, all in the name of "selling the game".
• At least the Pittsburgh Penguins understand the importance of fans.
• NCAA set to ruin beach . . . er . . . I mean "sand" volleyball. Why God, why?
  
• Athlete divorces going public always make for a good read.
• We would like to know if so-called-expert Mel Kiper takes into account team needs before composing his mock draft.
• Reality show? Michael Irvin? When and where do we tune in?
• Why Kurt Warner is a better quarterback than Peyton Manning [Editor's Note: That's impossible]. And no, the answer is not Jesus. Wait, is it?
• This is why my yet-to-be-conceived children will own and play every single sports video game out there.
• If we read this poster right, David Bonaduce and Jose Canseco are set to make out this weekend.
• Come on, who has not scored in the "centre circle" with her? [Editor's Note: ba-ZING!]
  
• What's going on with girls' high school basketball in Texas? Last week it was it was 94-1; this week, 100-0. And the team wants to forfeit the victory?
• The PGA Tour, having run out of local "phenoms" who will ultimately fail to challenge Tiger Woods, starts shipping them in from abroad.

The way we see it, this weeks Link Dump has a little bit of everything for your viewing pleasure. We have got a former-SC player looking retarded [Editor's Note: No, not that one, the other one . . . no, not him, the OTHER one . . .], an impressive display of athleticism, and, of course, people getting hurt. What could be better?

• We have a nickname for you LenDale: whine and dine. [GameTime, TBD© challenge: define "swagger-jack".]
• Later that night, these two double alley-ooped the head varsity cheerleader. [Editor's Note: they did what?]
• This stunt was destined for greatness (read: failure) from the get go.
• Pen tricks that end in an awesomely-fantastic manner.

Before we conclude, we have a bonus link for all you Star Wars fans out there. Have a great weekend everyone!

Where Am I?

It has been a whirlwind of a week for the old BAP; I am still trying to get my head wrapped around everything. First, as you are all aware, earlier this week the Lions management finally pulled their heads out of their collective you-know-whats and showed Matt Millen the door. Now I am stuck trying to figure out what their next move is and how they might salvage some respect out of this season. But I have got to tell you, that is not the least of it. Last night, all hell broke loose.

The Dodgers lost last night, but still managed to clinch the division title and a playoff birth. National League West baseball, it is fantastic! Then, my bank was seized by the Feds and sold to J.P. Morgan. Now, I have an economics background, so I understand what is going on and that my money is safe. But when I got into my office this morning I overheard someone talking about how glad they were they closed their WaMu accounts last week. So then I had to explain to this person how, much to their surprise, they contributed to the Fed taking action last night. I know it sounds counter-intuitive, people, but if your bank is struggling, the worst thing you can do is close your accounts. Do you remember the Great Depression?

Speaking of Great Depression, memo to USC fans: make sure to get your tickets on the shady side of the Rose Bowl. I am not going to go out and say I saw this coming, but a buddy of mine from work is a die-hard Trojan fan and yesterday he and I both noted that Corvallis is a tough place to play (see, e.g., USC at Oregon St. circa 2006). I had stopped by the driving range on my way home from work and when I got back in my car, I heard something about 14-0 and assumed the Trojans were up. Imagine my elation when I turned on the game at home (much to the "joy" of My Better Half) just in time to see Oregon St. go up 21-0 right before halftime. Oh, you knew it was only a matter of time before the ESPN spin machine was going to start coming up with excuses. My favorite was, early in the fourth quarter with USC trailing 21-14, when Mark Sanchez avoided a rush but threw an incompletion. Craig James (ESPN commentator) followed by calling Sanchez's performance "gutsy" because he apparently has a bad leg and was not 100% healthy. I would appreciate it if ESPN would stop slobbering all over USC's "knob". Sanchez's performance was not gutsy. Oregon St. is a bad team. I have never taken a snap in a high school football game, let alone college, and I should have been able to lead USC to a victory . . .though, let's be honest, I probably would have thrown the game intentionally, having put my life savings on Oregon St. to win outright. Also of note, I had to watch the last five minutes of the game on my computer because our DVR can only record two shows at once, and with The Office and Grey's Anatomy premiering last night, we had to watch one (and by one, I obviously mean Grey's Anatomy as if I had a choice, because Armageddon would descend upon us if My Better Half was unable to text her friends throughout the entire two-hour episode).

And to top if off, this morning on my way to work, I saw a biker-chick driving a Harley in a pink Juicy Couture track suit . . . that was about two sizes too small. No one should have to endure that until they have at least gotten their morning coffee. So I am gonna go make an appointment to see Dr. Finklestein and I am gonna tell him we have a whole new bag of issues. We can forget about Mom for a while. In the meantime, here are some things you might have missed:

• Following up on last week's shocking developments, this Idaho cheerleader story has got some legs (bad pun absolutely intended) and I promise to stay on top of them . . . er . . . it.
  
• True story: one day in high school, we showed up to school to find ABC, NBC, CBS, and ESPN news vans at our campus. We thought it was cool until we discovered our wrestling team had an incident shockingly similar to this.
• With a net worth of $7.81 million, former Redskins quarterback Heath Shuler is the 35th richest congressman.
• It was only a matter of time before that big performance-enhancing drug scandal broke in the world of competitive walking . . . wait, what?
• The Glock 26 was an obvious choice because everyone knows that bringing a .22 to a pee wee soccer game would be suicide.
• Congratulations to Navy for getting the first Bowl Bid of the season; that is, the 2010 season.
• This is not sitting well with my buddies in Chicago.
• Chinese gymnastics team on track to finally be old enough to compete at 2012 Olympics in London.
• 7-Time Tour de France winner to join team of 2007 Tour de France winner. Clearly this is going to end well.
• Tattoos? Check. Mohawk? Check. Necklace made from your own finger? Check.

For your Friday afternoon viewing pleasure, and in honor of the networks premiering the new seasons of their shows over the next few weeks, I have decided to put together a collection of my favorite commercials of late. Oh, and I also had to throw in perhaps the greatest catch in the history of football:

• I am no physicist, but I am pretty sure this catch defies the laws of physics in some way, shape or form.
• Ironically enough, my friends and I acted the same way last weekend.
• On several occasions, I have been accused of having a man-crush on Peyton Manning. This probably will not help my cause.
• It is weird when you see your old home videos turned into a commercial. Man, I was smooth back then.

Have a great weekend everyone!

How Did This Happen?

Believe it or not (and I'm guessing most of you will not), Friday snuck up on me this week. It has been a crazy week at home and at the office. I did not realize today was Friday until last night when I was setting my alarm. I even watched Grey's Anatomy last night (which, right now anyways, is like pulling off 1,000 band-aids very slowly. . . it might be the one show that the writers' strike actually helps); a show I know airs on Thursday nights. Weird. So now it is Friday and I actually have a chance to take a short breather. I am planning on working overtime this weekend, for my GameTime, TBD© readers, to get a full post up by Sunday; I have already started working on it and I must say, it might be the most serious post I have ever written. For now, I want you to take a breather too, and catch up on some things you might have missed:

• How could the Minnesota Vikings possibly think this was the right thing to do?
• Somewhere in America, Bill Belichick is wondering why he did not think of this first.
• A priest stops molesting his alter boy for a moment and . . . starts stalking Conan O'Brien?
• The newest nominee for the 2007 Dumbest Criminal in America award.
• Want to know the difference between a great senior prank and sheer stupidity?
• So let me get this straight, I can text message anything I want and it will be displayed on the Jumbotron? How can anything possibly go wrong.
• A supermodel with a brain . . . now that is a scary thought.
• I wrote my high school term paper on Alcatraz and how it was a hotel for prisoners. Well, it turns out there actually is a prison hotel, and you too can stay there for at least $319 per night.
• As if New York Jets fans needed another reason to be depressed.

And for your Friday double feature, I would like to take this opportunity to salute athletes who endorse products:

• Tony Siragusa: Former Pro Football Player and Food Connoisseur.
• Three words: Laser-rocket arm.

And just in case you, like me, have had a long week and need just a couple extra minutes of fun, here is a bonus feature for you:

• Peyton Manning is just a likable guy. (I know it's old, but it still makes me laugh.)

Have a great weekend everyone!