Big Boy Work Day

As you all know by now, an early edition of GameTime, TBD©'s world-renowned (might be a slight exaggeration) Link Dump is never a good sign.  Unfortunately, the Chief is off doing "big boy" work today, so we are without our fearless leader.

But do not think you are going to be left completely empty-handed on this fine Friday.  Before heading out the door this morning, the Chief proclaimed: "It's Halloween weekend.  Make sure they at least get a pic of a celebrity in a sexy Halloween costume and some Halloween-related videos or something."  What a guy, right?  Always looking out you, our dear readers.

After significant "research", it turns out there are not a lot of A-list celebrities who have been photographed wearing your average "Slutty _______" costume.  That was quite upsetting.  We refuse to associate the likes of Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton with this classy establishment, so that has brought us to Annalyne McCord of [*googles Annalyne McCord*] the new 90210 fame.  Ms. McCord wins out because she rocked a sexy Batgirl for Halloween back in 2009 and, since we are comic book nerds (shocking, I know), that works for us.

As for the videos, well, we will just let them speak for themselves:

• In non-Halloween fail-related news, (1) a trampoline-to-pool jump ends with predictable results, and (b) not exactly the type of impression you want to make at freshmen orientation.
• Melanie Iglesias is "famous" for being a "model" and making "flipbook-style" videos of her changing in and out of clothing.  She was nice enough to make a "Halloween Edition" of the flipbook video, which is nice because she apparently considers bikinis to be acceptable "costumes".  [Editor's Note: new record for excessive quotation mark usage . . . go us!]
• Some people have way too much time on their hands.  Thankfully, some of those some people use their time for awesomeness.

Have a great weekend everyone!  Ladies, do not forget to treat your men to that "Slutty ________" costume they have been not-so-subtly hinting at for the past month. 

When Fantasy Meets Reality . . .

. . . the Chief folds like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guy with sores on his face . . . or something like that.

[Editor's Note: If you missed the Chief's 2011-2012 Los Angeles Kings Season Preview, which went up Tuesday, do yourself a favor and check it out.]

Between Monday and Wednesday of this week, I was asked for my take on the Jim Schwartz-Jim Harbaugh brewhaha roughly eleventy billion times.  Needless to say, it was a perfect topic for the Link Dump introduction.  But by Wednesday I was a little tired of talking about it (yes, they're both to blame; no, it wasn't that big of deal, let's move on . . . oh, and Harbaugh's a jag-bag . . . now we'll move on).  So, I am not going to lie, I was kind of hoping something would come up between then and now that I could talk about instead.

And, as usual, the blog-o-sphere Gods came through in the clutch.

We have often discussed the Chief's "Top 5" here on GameTime, TBD©.  For the uninitiated, the Chief's "Top 5" is a list comprised of the five female celebrities the Chief would have a "hall pass" from my Better Half if the "opportunity" ever arose.  [Editor's Note: Don't worry, she has her list too; we're an equal opportunity household.]  While the list changes slightly from time to time (the bottom two slots usually rotate to the newest "it girl"), the top three have remained the same for quite some time:  (1) Marisa Miller (naturally), (b) today's Link Dump introduction (cliff hanger!!!!), and (iii) Kelly Ripa (I can't explain it, there's just something there).  I am sure our more avid readers already know who our mystery woman is; I mean she has shown up on this site once or twice before.  For those of you who do not, shame on you.

With the Chief desperate for a new introduction topic to magically fall into his lap, imagine what his surprise when, on Wednesday afternoon, not only did a new topic fall into his lap, the topic involved his "Top 5".  On Wednesday afternoon, the GameTime, TBD© office received a tenant notice email from the building managers, as we do from time to time (wow, twice in one post?).  Usually the email is about fire drills, elevator maintenance, protest alerts, lame things like that.  But this email was different, for this email read:

We have been informed that filming for the upcoming movie Underworld IV, staring Kate Beckinsale, will  be taking place this Thursday, October 20, 2011 from 6pm until 6am Friday morning.  The film crew has secured a City permit for the closing of the alley. This closure will affect the parking ally entrance and exit.  Once again the alley will close at 6pm on Thursday and all access to the parking structure will be from Figueroa Street.

If you read past the first line of that email then, congratulations, you got farther than the Chief did.  The Chief was clearly focused on one thing: this woman, number two on his list, was possibly going to be in the alley right behind the GameTime, TBD© offices.  There was an immediate call for an Underwold movie marathon (slightly weird) as part of an office slumber party (slightly more weird) all so the Chief could possibly make a move on a married woman filming scenes for a movie directed by her husband (good luck with that).  Thankfully, the Chief realized that the email did not state she WOULD be part of the filming, so he relented on the plans.  But it should surprise absolutely no one that, all day yesterday, the Chief could "feel her presence", like he was a jedi knight or something.

Now that the night has passed, the Chief is on a mission to verify that Ms. Beckinsale was not here yesterday to put his mind at ease about a "missed opportunity".  So, while we humor the poor guy by going to talk with some of the production crew still cleaning up the alley, here are some stories you might have missed from the week that was:

• Sometimes almost being traded can be a miracle in disguise.  Just ask Jerome Harrison.
• Scam artists posing as famous athletes have been fooling the public for years: a pudgy sex offender pretending to be Vince Young, a petty thief claiming he was Ben Roethlisberger, Jay Cutler posing as an NFL quarterback, etc . . . 
• Looks like Green Bay wide-receivers should have some pretty sweet entertainment centers by the end of the season.
• Allow me to be the first to welcome Bill Simmons aboard the Los Angeles Kings bandwagon.  At least I think that is what he is trying to say in this article about the NHL that seems to be about the NBA.
• What do you get when a newspaper, owned by a church that believed in black racial inferiority until 1978, writes an article about a predominantly black sport? This.
• Dwight Gooden confirms what we already knew/expected about Dwight Gooden.
• "Vegas loves long shots" . . .  except when said long shots are about to cost them some money.
•  There is always someone else to blame, right Charlie?
• Who knew getting drunk and throwing pointy objects at a wall could be so lucrative?  Having already mastered one of those, maybe I should consider a career change.  I mean, how hard is it to throw pointy objects?
• This is why I do not play professional sports.  [Editor's Note: right, that's why . . .]

We like to track our pageview data to see what topics tend to get us the most traffic and, surprising to some, our Kings season preview picked up a decent amount of traffic.  It should be interesting to see how Ms. Becksinsale stacks up (she certainly is stacked) against the Kings when this Dump goes to print.  Speaking of things to see (smooth transition as always), here are some videos to help your Friday afternoon fly by:

• Ever wonder what a squash ball hit 175 mph would do to a guy's back?  Me neither.  Nevertheless, we do now.
• Being the topper that I am, it is safe to say that when my yet-to-be-conceived child (don't want the 'rents to get the wrong idea) is old enough, we will crush this impressive Hot Wheels track.  [Editor's Note: eh, who am I kidding, I will probably do it this weekend.]
• I do not know about you, but I sure hate when someone posts video of me doing an awesome skateboard trick without my knowledge.
• The song in this video is terrible, the brunette dressed up as a referee in said video is not.  That is all.
• It is questions like this that prevent me from ever being able to go on Family Feud.
• Dirt Bike: 1, Random Chick: 0.
• I am guessing that crocodile will reconsider going after the full-grown adult elephant next time.
• Note to self, dinosaurs on steroids are scary.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Second Verse, Same As The First

[Editor's Note:  yes, I know the NHL regular season is a week old now, but I know you all are still dying to know what lies ahead for the Los Angeles Kings this season, right? RIGHT?]

It seems like only yesterday (probably cause I was still blacked-out until yesterday) that my friends and my Better Half teamed up to secretly add multiple ounces of sake to my beer before boisterously declaring it was time for another round of sake bombs on what was (from what I remember) a truly epic thirtieth birthday celebration.  Sadly though, the big three-one is already right around corner (December 17th . . . *hint* *hint* *wink* *wink*) and, as Father Time prepares to put another tick mark next my name, I find myself having more and more adult-like thoughts . . . and it scares me.

Though I refuse to admit it around my Better Half (so don't go telling on me), I do actually find myself thinking more and more about what it will be like to have kids.  And what emotion do these thoughts evoke the most?  Fear, pure fear.  It is not a general fear about having kids.  Nah, I am pretty down with that thought.  Rather, it is fear that arises from being a self-aware individual that knows his shortcomings and knows that many of these shortcomings fly directly in the face of what I know I can expect once I become a father.  Having had the privilege of watching my siblings and siblings-in-law raise multiple future hockey players and/or GameTime, TBD© writers, I have gained a general understanding of what goes into to raising a monster child.  Sadly, it means I have also gained an understanding of where the challenges are going to lie.  Most notably, while I am known for my patience, one thing I absolutely hate having to do is repeat myself.  Can not stand it; I get uber-frustrated uber-quickly when I have to repeat myself.  So, that should make years two through eighteen pretty fun when the time comes, right?

So, as a man who hates to repeat himself, imagine my frustration when I sat down to prepare my 2011-2012 Los Angeles Kings Season Preview and I realized I could pretty much regurgitate everything I wrote when previewing the 2010-2011 season.  I mean, do not get me wrong, it was a great preview.  Plus, as it turns out, I was pretty much spot on with everything I wrote.  To summarize, I stated that for the Kings' 2010-2011 season to be successful, they must (1) maintain their regular-season closing ability, (b) learn to close in the playoffs, and (iii) improve their five-on-five scoring.  I also predicted Jonathan Bernier would be the Kings' breakout player of the year.  So, how did the season play out?  Well:

• Regular-season closing:  like the year prior, the 2010-2011 Kings managed at least one point in every game they led after two periods, going 26-0-1 (.963 win percentage), which was third best in the league.  They also were able to go 16-9-3 in games that were tied after two periods (.571 win percentage).  The 2010-2011 Kings proved they could still close in the regular season.
• Playoff closing: after earning their second-straight trip to the Stanley Cup Playoffs, the Kings showed they had learned nothing from the year before.  As evidence, look no further than their game three collapse against San Jose in which they blew leads of 4-0 and 5-3 in the second period alone.  Once they lost that one, it was pretty clear that a first-round exit was inevitable and out in six they were.
• Five-on-five scoring:  well, the Kings offense was far from pretty last year.  If it was not for their spectacular defense (6th overall, 4th-best penalty kill, fewest power-play goals allowed), the Kings would not have made the playoffs.  Their offense was offensive, finishing 25th in the league overall and 21st on the power play.  The Kings managed only 148 goals five-on-five last year (17th best in the league) and scored only 209 goals total.
• Breakout player:  I chose our back-up goalie as our breakout player because I thought he would reduce the burden on Jonathan Quick by serving as a productive back-up goalie.  Bernier started 22 games last season, posting an 11-8-3 record with a respectable 2.48 goals-against average and .913 save percentage.  This allowed Quick to play in eleven fewer games and post career bests in goals-against average (2.24) and save percentage (.918).

So, at the risk of ticking myself off, the keys to the Kings 2011-2012 season are (1) maintaining their ability to close in the regular season, (b) learning to close in the playoffs, and (iii) improving their five-on-five scoring.  [Editor's Note: is there an echo in here?]  Thankfully, the Kings have Dean Lombardi, the best general manager in hockey, who spent the entire offseason making sure the Kings would not have a repeat season.  To be fair, the Kings offense took a major hit when they lost Anze Kopitar to a broken ankle with seven games left in the season.  But those seven games did not stop them from being a top-twenty offense.  And DL did try to address the scoring issues before Kopitar went down by acquiring Dustin Penner from Edmonton for a pile of [expletive deleted] at the trade deadline (jury is still out on who got the better deal).  But to be extra sure the offense improves this season, DL went on a shopping spree, trading uber-prospect Braden Schenn and fan-favorite Wayne Simmonds to Philadelphia for stud-center Mike Richards, signing veteran-winger Simon Gagne, re-signing franchise-defenseman Drew Doughty, and adding veteran depth/locker room leadership with the under-the-radar signings of Ehtan Moreau and Trent Hunter.

When all was said-and-done this offseason, the Kings had added $114.6 million in salary.  Ironically, Philip Anschutz-owned AEG bought the Kings out of bankruptcy in 1995 for only $113.25 million.  The addition of Richard and Gagne should, assuming Penner got himself into shape this offseason (jury is still out on that), give the Kings something they have lacked since the Gretzky era: two legitimate scoring lines and depth down the middle with Kopitar, Richards, and Jarret Stoll.  To top it all off, the Kings still have the cap space to add yet another top-six winger before the trade deadline if necessary (Zach Parise should would look nice in a Kings uniform).  By re-signing Doughty, the Kings are returning the same defensive group that allowed only 2.39 goals per game last year.  Add to that the fact the Kings have two number one goaltenders again this year, and you have yourself the makings of a pretty exciting season . . . at least on paper.  I guess it should come as no surprise that some experts have the Kings making their second Stanley Cup Finals appearance in franchise history.

Which brings me to this year's breakout player, the guy who is going to play the biggest role in helping the Kings get over the hump.  It is probably cheating to pick Mike Richards, what, since he already has two thirty-goal seasons, has scored 349 points in six season, and was the captain of the Flyers the last two seasons.  So I am going to go out on a limb and say this years breakout player is Simon Gagne.  Sure, Gagne is a two-time forty-goal scorer, but he has spent the better part of the last two seasons battling through injury and trying to regain his scoring touch.  If healthy, he will find that scoring touch.  It helps that he is being reunited with Richards, his former linemate during part of his ten seasons in Philadelphia.  I expect Gagne to net at least twenty-five goals this season, and if he plays in seventy-plus games, thirty is not out of the question.  Production like that gives the Kings two productive scoring lines to contend with come playoff time.

Come playoff time?  You bet your [expletive deleted] the Kings are headed back to the playoffs.  Expectations are again high for the Kings and, as was previously noted, so are mine.  I am both excited and nervous for the eighty-two games [Editor's Note: 78 . . .] that lie ahead because, for the first time in a long time (ever?), it is not just my bias that believes the Kings have legitimate shot at a run for the Cup.  Anything thing less than a deep playoff run will be a disappoint to most of the fans, myself included, and could actually spell the end of reign of Murray II.  I think they have what it takes this year, which means, come May/June, I fully expect to see Commissioner Bettman handing Lord Stanley's Cup to Dustin Brown.

And if that were to happen, maybe I will have my own future-hockey player/GameTime, TBD© writer come March 2013 . . . wait, what?

It's Back, And So Are We (Almost)

It has been exactly one hundred and sixty-five days--that is five months and twelve days for those of you not willing to count--since the San Jose Sharks end our beloved Los Angeles Kings 2010-2011 season in the first round of the playoffs.  And while some friends of the program [*cough* Ballgame *cough*] are too busy dancing around in fields of dandelions to notice, in a little over twenty-three minutes, the puck will drop on the Kings' 2011-2012 season and their first legitimate shot at a run for the Stanley Cup since a guy named Gretzky played here.

I know what you are thinking right about now: "A ten a.m. faceoff? The NHL has truly lost its mind."  Well, yes and no.  It is a ten a.m. faceoff because the game is being played in Stockholm, Sweden.  This is both cool and lame.  Cool, because it is fun to see the NHL share its talent with the world; lame, because it falls at the start of the work day here in California and, more importantly to our avid readers, in the middle of when the Chief should be putting the finishing touches on your weekly source of entertainment known as our Link Dump.

Well, needless to say, the Chief is far too preoccupied this morning with the expectations of the season to get around to a Link Dump for everyone, but at our "staff" meeting last night he made a few announcements that we are excited to share with you all today:  (1) the Chief's always entertaining season preview is in its final stages of preparation (blame Drew Doughty) and should be up and running sometime this weekend; (b) with expectations high for this year's team, the Chief has decided to it would be enjoyable for all of you to feel what he feels throughout the course of the season and will be writing weekly, if not more frequent, season updates for your enjoyment; and (iii) since he could not find the time to get you a Link Dump, the Chief at least was willing to find time to find a way (that's a lot of finding he did) to get you all somewhat interested in the start of the Kings season, with a little help from Kings Ice Girl Gabby.  It truly is summer all year long in Southern California.

The Chief also want me to reassure all of you that GameTime, TBD© is not about to become a Kings-only site; we will to our best to continue our Link Dumps and touch upon any major sports-related topic that may arise in the normal course of business.  For example, do not forget to tune in to Monday Night Football this coming Monday, when Jay Cutler may ACTUALLY die on the football field when his offensive line-less Chicago Bears travel to Detroit for the much anticipated (at least by the Chief) showdown with the Lions.

In the meantime, have a great weekend everyone!

No Time; There's Never Any Time . . .

There is so much to talk about these days but, unfortunately, we do not have any time to talk about them . . . at least today.

First and foremost, we had an unexcused absence last week, and for that we apologize.  The Chief got hauled of to Chicago for actual work and, well, nothing happens around these parts without the Chief's say.  He was originally supposed to have time last Friday morning to finalize a short message but instead tried to catch an earlier flight home.  You can not blame a man for trying to get back to Southern California early, can you? 

What is that? You can?  Hmmm . . . I will make sure to pass that information along.

Unfortunately, actual work is also going to keep us from bringing you a full fledged Link Dump this week as well.  It is sad, really, because there is so much for us to talk about.  The Detroit Lions are back; the Los Angeles Kings played their first preseason game (hockey's back!); it is Bruce Springsteen's birthday today; the Boston Red Sox are in the middle of an epic end-of-season collapse which has decimated our once-promising experiment; we could go on and on and on.  But it was not meant to be today.  We. Are. Sorry.  Hopefully Marisa can cleanse us of our guilt (see what I did there?).

So, while we are not bringing you a full Link Dump this week, we thought we would at least provide you with some videos to help get you through your Friday.  Better than nothing, right?

• Take it from someone who has been there, nothing good comes from being the straight-gay friend.
• A look at what the Chief does in his spare time.  He is talented like that.  [Editor's Note: yes, I know a million other things ran through your head about what the Chief does in his spare time . . .]
• I knew Alec was hiding from his brothers!
• "Ain't no way, yo!"
• FIFA 12 is coming out soon for your preferred game system, and EA Sports has mercilessly abused my man crush on both Steve Nash and Landon Donovan to promote it.
• I have no idea what this event is, but at least Joey is okay.
• Keep your eye on the ball kid.  Well done.
• Last night was the 300th edition of JKL's "Unnecessary Censorship", and apparently someone in the audience really liked hearing Mr. Rogers fake swear.
• Secondary highlight of this video: "Craig Jams 4 Senataur (paid 4 by espn)"
• What better way to learn the rules of rugby than from scantily-clad/oiled-up ladies?  You. Are. Welcome.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Dear God, It's Beautiful!

[Editor's Note: the title of this post is to be read like this, not like you're in a church service.  That is all.]

College football started last weekend, the NFL officially kicked off last night, the NHL returns in a month, and it is still bikini season in Southern California.  Life.  Is.  Good.

Another little-known highlight of this time of year is watching the Chief's great debate over fantasy football.  I am not talking about him agonizing over which player to draft when (to be honest, I've always been impressed with his "just tell me who's been injured and I'll go from there" attitude when drafting).  No, the Chief's great debate is always over how many leagues he should join.  It is comical.  Every year around early-August, the first invite comes in and, invariably, the Chief announces "I'm cutting back this year; it's time."  So, it is time for us to ask the question: Chief, how did that "cutting back" go this year?

Survey says . . . [click].

On Wednesday, the Chief entered the GameTime, TBD© offices with quite the serious look on his face.  Asked what the problem was, the Chief merely shook his head in disgust and responded "I just agreed to join a sixth fantasy football league."  You read that right, his SIXTH (6th) fantasy football league.  So much for cutting back.  To be fair, up until Tuesday, the Chief had done a mighty fine job of limiting himself to the four leagues he considers most important: (1) the sixteenth season with his high school friends; (b) the big money "actual work" league that he has dominated for four years; (iii) a keeper league with GameTime, TBD© regulars Moneybags, Ballgame, and the rest of the extended-college crew; and (4) a league full of jackasses (true story).  Little did the chief know that, on Wednesday morning, Grantland was going to introduce the world to a new type of fantasy football:  The Bad Quarterback League.  I kid you not when I say that, within minutes of that article being posted, the Chief's email and gchat exploded with invitations to join a Bad Quarterback League ("BQL").  How could he possibly resist a new type of league?  I will not lie, the fact he was able to limit himself to only two BQLs is a bit of a miracle in-and-of-itself.  But, nevertheless, here we are, one day into the 2011 NFL season and the Chief is juggling six different teams.  Come December, the Chief is either going to be rolling in the dough, or having that awkward conversation with My Better Half about why her Christmas gift is going to be a little smaller than normal.

My oh my, it is going to be a stressful season for the Chief.  But if there is one thing you know to be true, the Chief will never root for a player when facing his beloved Detroit Lions, no matter what is on the line.  So, while help the Chief sort through his various rosters and make those final starting line-up decisions, here are some things you might have missed to help get you through your Friday afternoon:

• This one goes out to all of you who are (1) fans of the Lions, and (b) fans of an attractive woman wearing practically nothing.  [Editor's Note: is underboob considered NSFW?]
• If you have not heard (what, do you live in a cave?), the Chief's man crush is missing a game for the first time in his career . . . and that is a tough break for Rick Reilly.
• Arian Foster might not care what you think about his fantasy stats, but the NFL certainly does.
• Do not know which teams to bet on this weekend?  When all else fails, look to the WAGs.
• Just when I thought you could not possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this . . . and totally one up yourself.  Thank you, Canada.
• Women set record for world's longest hockey game.  Ten days long? Man, that is a lot of periods.
• Ah yes, the old "Do you know who I am?" defense.  Never seems to work out like you expect it to.
• "Should Notre Dame's Coach Be Fired for Cursing?"  Yes, you read that correctly.
•  Your sports-related "Good Samaritan of the Week" award goes to these two college football players.
• Which, naturally, leads us to our sports-related "Not-So-Good Samaritan of the Week" award . . . look at that face, is anyone really surprised?
• Speaking of faces, look at this face.  It screams cheater, does it not?
• Single and ready to mingle in England?  Here is hoping that the two percent of your population that looks good in lingerie are also Newcastle United fans.

As if I did not feel bad enough for England already.  First they had to deal with the heartbreak of the Chief declining duel citizenship when he turned eighteen.  And now comes word that only two percent . . . TWO PERCENT . . . of their population looks good in lingerie?  Ouch.  Well, at least we have a collection of videos for you that look in anything and everything.  I guess things are looking up for our English readers:

• The Onion Sports Network prepares you for the first week of NFL action as only the Onion Sports Network can . . . with rape jokes.  Yikes.
• To help the Chief make it through the first week of football without Peyton Manning since 1998, here are three of his favorite Manning commercials:  (1) laser-rocket arm, natch; (b) oh, CUT cut; and (iii) taking a hike.
• New Era is almost making me want to buy hats again, thanks to its Rivalry campaign, which has now brought us John Krapulewski and proof that 9-1-1 for rich people actually exists.
• You would think getting to bang Brooklyn Decker whenever you want would give you a cheery disposition, no?
• Soccer fail?  Soccer fail.
• Who knew BMX biking was so exciting?  Apparently these guys.

Before we bid you all adieu, we wanted to take a moment to remember all those lost ten years ago this Sunday on September 11th, 2001. The Chief was unable to come up with any words he deemed worthy enough to honor those who died on that, so he decided to add one extra video to this week's Link Dump.  It is the opening moments of David Letterman's first show after the events that have changed our country forever.  We remember those who lost their lives and give thanks for those who managed to survive.

Please, have a great weekend everyone!

Down, But Not Out

Unfortunately, it looks like things will be dark at the GameTime, TBD© offices for the next couple of weeks.  Sadly, "actual work" is going to prevent us from getting you a Link Dump this week.  Plus, the end of summer comes next week in the form of Labor Day, and The Chief is off to Seattle to spend one final weekend with his friends celebrating the summer that was.  So we will be down for the next couple weeks.

But do not think for one second that we are going to send you off empty handed.  Usually at this point in time, we throw up a picture of an attractive female celebrity, usually blond, to help provide at least some of you (read: all male readers and those female readers that are awesome) a little pleasure for your Friday grind.  Well, a few of our readers commented that they felt uncomfortable reading our Link Dump because they did not know if, once the page loaded, there would be a huge picture of a scantily-clad hottie for all to see on their office computer.  So, as proof that we do take your feed back very seriously, and definitely do not want to negatively impact your ability to enjoy our site at all times, we will no longer be throwing up random pictures of scantily-clad attractive women, usually blond.  Instead, we will either provide you with a link to a picture of a scantily-clad attractive woman, usually blond, or embed a video of the same.

For our first go-round of this new strategy, we have a video.  Now, the video does not really need an introduction, but you are getting one nonetheless.  I had a dream last night and, while some of details of said dream are hazy at best, one part really stands out.  In my dream, My Better Half's entire wardrobe consisted of lingerie; and for some reason it was not seen as a sexual thing because it was just her wardrobe.  She was a kept woman in the dream, so she did not have to wear lingerie to work.  But, going to the grocery store? Cooking dinner? Going to the mall?  Nothing like a chemise and thigh-highs to get you through the day.  Now, anyone who knows us knows that I severely out kicked my coverage with My Better Half; certified smokeshow.  So in real life, this would not work because we would never leave our house.  But in dream land? I certainly am not going to complain.  And when I thought about what might have been the impetus for this dream (besides a general desire to see My Better Half in lingerie more often), I realized I had the video we are using to appease you all to thank.  Yes, it is two minutes and forty seconds of a behind-the-scenes look at a Sara Jean Underwood lingerie shoot (would you look at that, attractive female, usually blond . . . go figure).  You.  Are.  Welcome.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Oopsies

Two things:

(1) First and foremost, we would like to apologize for the complete radio silence last Friday here at GameTime, TBD©.  My Better Half and I celebrated our third anniversary last week (time flies when you're having fun) and as our gifts to each other we planned a group orgy trip to San Francisco for the Outside Lands music festival.  We flew up to San Francisco early Friday and, in all the excitement, I shirked my duties to you, our dear readers, and failed to provide you with any form of entertainment whatsoever.  If it makes you feel any better, the festival was totally uh-mazing.  It was highlighted by Muse on Saturday night, which was pretty much one of the best live shows I have seen.  I also got to see Majer Lazer, Arcade Fire, Phish, OK Go, The Arctic Monkeys, Deadmau5 (which My Better Half said sounded like one long song [shakes head]) and The Black Keys, who were, by far, the surprise performance of the weekend for me.  And it was all punctuated by the fact that I got to enjoy the weekend with My Better Half in celebration of three great years.

(B) Speaking of My Better Half, she and I dove into Season 2 of The Tudors this week (yes we're a little behind the times).  If you have not seen The Tudors, the show can essentially be broken down into two parts, (1) Henry VIII yelling, and (b) people getting it on (turns out people loved to do the nasty back then, who knew?).  Anyways, during a scene of the latter kind with Henry and Anne Boleyn, My Better Half said the following:  "Natalie Dormer (actress who plays Anne Boleyn) has an amazing rack."  I commented that I thought they looked kind of fake because they did not really move, to which My Better Half noted that it was more the position of her body preventing them from moving and they were definitely not fake.   [Editor's Note: reason no. 347,218,769 why My Better Half is better than yours . . . she's so confident in herself that she strikes up conversations about other chicks breasts.]

For the record, I am absolutely terrible at telling the difference between real and fake breasts.  Unless a woman is rocking sweater kittens pointing north of the border, I am just as likely to think someone is wearing a good push-up bra as I am to think they paid ten grand for the right to never wear a bra again.  I attribute this deficiency to two things: (1) my general lack of interest in strip clubs, porn, and the like; and, somewhat related, (b) never having seen a pair up close (to my knowledge) and/or felt a pair.  To be honest, it is somewhat embarrassing when I am totally oblivious and either my friends or My Better Half makes a comment and I am none-the-wiser.  This is a problem I would like to remedy.  So, if (1) you are a reader of GameTime, TBD©, (b) have fake breasts, and (iii) are cool with me feeling your fake rack in a totally platonic way, go ahead and drop us a line via Twitter or email.  Do not worry, I figure the whole scene will play out something like this (which will be followed by this interaction with one of my friends . . . naturally).

Well, our little corner of the world wide web is so popular, I imagine the offers from fake-breasted ladies should start rolling in any moment now.  So while we are off checking Twitter and our email, here are some things you might have missed from the week that was:

• Okay, so I am pretty sure you did not miss the news about "The U", but if you have not read the official Yahoo Sports report, I recommend you do so now.
• Now, that you are caught up on all the dirty details, this flowchart should make more sense.
• With people debating whether or not Miami should get the "death penalty" for its transgressions, I think it is time we check in with Southern Methodist University, the only school to actually receive the death penalty, and their new strip club-esque football locker room.
• Well, at least he was honest.
• The lawsuit ten years in the making has finally arrived.
• Would you look at that, intelligent life does exist inside the New York Islanders organization.
• "This is a beautiful story of modern reconciliation."
• Baseball players always manage to find interesting ways to injure themselves.  Today's culprit: sleep.
• Let this be a lesson to you children, think twice before speeding on your motorcycle with multiple loaded guns.
• Robbie Keane is bringing his talents to Los Angeles.  Of course, by "his talents", I meant these. [Editor's Note: fake, right?]
• If ever there was a good reason for workers to strike, I would think "when a barrel filled with chemical products exploded" is it.
• When future law students study the First Amendment, this should be an interesting topic of discussion.

Right, the offers will start rolling in any second now . . . [checks watch] . . . well, you know, it is Friday and I am sure most of you are just trying to get out early.  So I imagine they will come in this weekend, and then we can go from there.  In the meantime, here are some videos to help you get through the rest of your work week.  Just as a heads up, this is probably, time wise, the longest collection of videos we have ever posted.  Excited?  Here we go:

• Twelve minutes of girl fails?  Twelve minutes of [mostly-drunk] girl fails.
• As it turns out, some of the most famous lines/scenes in cinematic history were never scripted; go figure.  [Editor's Note: strong language, headphones/closing of office door advised.]
• Ages ago, we brought you "Batting Stance Guy" impersonating . . . well . . . batting stances.  As it turns out, he does some other pretty solid impersonations as well.
• Ah yes, the old "racket-to-balls" trick.  Gets them every time.
• Why use just words when you can look like an idiot instead?  Thanks, ESPN.
• I would not mind seeing a few more Swingers references around here, so might as well get the ball rolling on that one.
• Not shown: me doing everything Danny MacAskill does . . . blindfolded.
• I imagine the presidential primaries will be providing Jimmy Kimmel with plenty of unnecessary censorship opportunities.  Oh look, I am right.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Commence Operation: Game Changer

One of the reasons I chose to go with complete anonymity on GameTime, TBD© is that it allows me to talk more openly about things without embarrassing people too much.  Sure, many of my most avid readers are close friends, so the anonymity is somewhat wasted.  Yet my little corner of the world wide web is open to any and all comers, and I want them to be able to enjoy this site for not only our humor, but our willingness to open about life as well.  After all, it is "a look at sports and life".

Training for four half marathons over the past year has definitely taught me a lot of things.  After all, you can go crazy if you do not have something interesting to focus on during miles ten and beyond.  Sometimes I will just focus on another runner to help me keep pace (a "carrot" if you will).  Other times I focus on things going on in my life to distract me from my legs' constant questioning of "What did we do to you to deserve this?"  But while I have mastered the tricks necessary to get through my training, I have yet conquer, perhaps, the greatest hurdle:  the overwhelming disappointment I feel in myself when a run does not go as well as I thought.

Distance running is a fickle sport.  There are so many factors that contribute to the success, or lack thereof, for any given run.  Temperature, wind, the call of nature, road conditions, and other runners are just a few.  These are things that are out of a runners' control.  But I am a competitive person, so when a run does not go as well as I had planned, I tend to be consumed by thoughts of what I did or did not do that contributed to the outcome.

If you have not guessed it by now, the San Francisco Half Marathon did not go as well as I had hoped.  I will not lie, it was my slowest of the four.  And to top it off, around mile ten I got [censored] on by a bird.  And while my Better Half and my friends are great at making me feel better, the results have been eating away at me all week.  And that is how I have gotten to this point, the start of what I call Operation: Game Changer.  If I am going to be the runner I know I can be, some things have got to change.  For starters, I did battle through a little burn out during training this time around, so I am taking the six weeks I have between now and the start of the next training period to enjoy some new forms of physical activities.  For example, I did yoga with my Better Half this week (#WINNING), and it was great.  I can also take this time to throw some weight training back into the routine, which is always enjoyable.  Sure, I still need to run to keep my base up, but I am going to embrace the opportunity to freshen up my non-running days.  Most importantly, however, is that I am going to really focus on my nutrition and finally conquer some of my life-long weight issues.  Sure, my height and broad shoulders allow me to carry my weight without looking big, but the GameTime, TBD© family has not been blessed with best knees in the business.  I have been stuck in this 225 to 230 pound zone for far too long.  If I can get back to my "playing" weight, I figure the reduced stress on my joints is going to be good for a couple extra minutes alone.

My next half marathon is the Big Sur Half on November 20th.  I actually run that half as a training run for the Surf City Half Marathon that falls on Super Bowl Sunday.  But that will be my first marker of progress, and a run I am looking forward to more than ever.  Operation: Game Changer has officially commenced.

Okay, that was probably a little heavier than you were expecting for your Link Dump introduction.  So how about we me just go ahead and get to the more entertaining portion of our show?

• Look, Michelle, reputations come from somewhere.  So maybe you need to think about your role in all of this as well.
• Feel-good, stor-y (clap, clap, clap clap clap).
• Northwestern wants your help picking its new basketball court design.  Choice E, "Are These The Only Choices?", strangely absent.
• Matt Stairs retired on Wednesday, which is only news because it allows us to revisit the greatest quote in post-game press conference history.
• I do not remember this scene from Bull Durham.
• Perhaps a couple years in college would have done him some good.
• "Walker attempted to eat eight grams of marijuana before being arrested."
• Funny, I always thought "nude recreation" was a major offered at ASU.  After all, is that not how most of its female population spends the majority of their six years there?
• I am going to go out on a limb and guess that she is probably looking for some new representation at this point in time.

I am not going to lie, while I am glad the NFL lockout is over, it has made it a lot more difficult to find entertaining stories for the Link Dump.  The crazed coverage that all the sports media outlets are giving to the NFL is getting a little annoying.  However, while the NFL coverage has limited our access to entertaining stories, it has not limited our access to entertaining videos.  Hooray!

• I played soccer for twelve years, and was definitely above average [Editor's Note: #humblebrag].  That being said, I could not do this if you gave one thousand chances (I'm guessing).
• In these fifty-nine seconds, the womens' athletic movement is set back roughly two decades.  Impressive, no? 
• Oh, and this is not helping either.
• See . . . I . . . what I meant was . . . um . . .
• A double dose of Jimmy Kimmel for you this week: (1) the always enjoyable (at least to me) Unnecessary Censorship; and (b) an introduction to Tiger Woods's new caddy.
• After watching this waterslide fail, I guess I can not be too surprised about the grammar fail.
• The best three minutes of your day.  [Editor's Note: TWSS!]

Have a great weekend everyone!

Run Away, Run Away

We here at GameTime, TBD© acknowledge that this is us today:

On the bright side, Kate Upton was out there doing what she does best (read: looking hot in a bikini) earlier this week:

So, there that is.

Anyways, long story short, The Chief is headed off to San Francisco this afternoon for his fourth half marathon in the past year. [Editor's Note: *applause, applause, applause . . . trumpets, trumpets, trumpets . . . fanfare, fanfare, fanfare*  Thank you; you're all too kind.]  Unfortunately, that means we are short on time this week and will not be able to provide you with your weekly dose of entertainment, commonly known as the Link Dump (hence the boring picture of the moderately attractive female above).  But in our effort to never leave you completely empty-handed on a Friday (see, e.g., said picture above), here is a six-second video that provides the shock-and-awe response we like around here (shock, as in "Oh my!", and awe, as in "Awwwwwwwww-[censored], did that really just happen?").  I have watched this video at least twenty times this week and it still cracks me up.

As always, we appreciate your continued support and understanding on days like this.  Have a great weekend everyone!

Gone, But Not Forgotten

[Editor's Note: yup, the bathroom scene still gets me every time.]

Summer vacation was fun while it lasted, but it feels good to be back up and running at the GameTime, TBD© offices.  After an extended break like we took, you almost forget how much fun it is to review stories and videos with an eye towards the Link Dump for Friday.  So here we are, ready to go again. [Editor's Note: that's what she said!]

I am not going to lie, I did not have a good time watching the U.S. Women's National Team lose to Japan last Sunday.  It certainly did not help in my recovery from the wedding My Better Half and I had attended the night before (I think she was still drunk during the match).  Watching that game, it was hard to believe that we were only a week removed from one of the greatest moments in soccer (of any gender) history.  [Editor's Note: still gives me chills . . .]  But while the Women's World Cup may be gone, the women of the World Cup are certainly not forgotten.  Every where you look this week, someone from the USWNT is there.  So, we figured, why not cash in on some of the hype as well?  And, well, from there, it was fairly obvious (to us at least) how best to "cash in" on said hype . . .

That is right, dear readers, it is time for the next installment of GameTime, TBD©'s favorite game, Marry-[Censored]-Kill, the USWNT Edition.  Outside of Abby Wambach and her forehead, the two other players to receive a significant amount of attention over the past three weeks were goaltender Hope Solo and striker Alex Morgan, and it was not just because of their play on the field.  [Editor's Note: that depends on what "field" you're referring to, no? BIYOMBO!]  To the surprise of many onlookers, it turned out Hope and Alex are pretty easy on the eyes (I mean just look how excited a Washington State fan got for Alex, a Berkeley alum . . . that's saying something).  So, with two of our three contestants ready for a showdown, who should join them?  I am sure there are many people out there who find Abby attractive, but short hair is not really my thing which would make the choice too obvious.  We like out competition to be stiff.  [Editor's Note: yeah we did.]  So, without a doubt, we have to go with perennial USWNT hottie Heather Mitts, who missed the 2003 and 2007 WWCs due to injury.  With that being settled, we would like to know which of these soccer ladies you would marry, [censored], and kill: (1) Heather Mitts; (b) Alex Morgan; and (iii) Hope Solo.

Let me begin by saying it was difficult to find comparative pictures of all the ladies.  Alex Morgan has been a sports blog-favorite for several years, so her Facebook photos have been splashed all over the internet.  And Heather Mitts has posed for the Sports IllustratedSwimsuit Issue with her husband, quaterback A.J. Feeley.  Hope, on the other, burst on to the hotness scene during the World Cup, so the options were somewhat limited for her.  That is why, in fairness to all, we went with photos from a team photo shoot.  That being said, the photos do not really do any of these ladies justice, so do yourself a favor and run a search in Google images (you know, "research" the topic).  When asked to weigh in, The Chief threw us a wild card.  We "type-cast" Mitts for The Chief, and what does he do?  He goes out there and says "It's a sad day when an attractive blond has to bite the bullet."  Apparently, there is something about Hope's new brunette look that The Chief "can't explain, but [he finds] her shockingly attractive."  Plus, friend-of-the-program Ballgame is absolutely in love with Alex and her pink sports bra, so the Chief could not possibly take her from him.  But, sleep with her once?  Eskimo Brothers it is.

It is never easy, is it?  For some of you, it might take a while to "research" the topic and mull over your options.  Others of you will probably just fire from the hip.  So, it is best that move on to the links for those of you who have already decided:

• The eighth and final season of Entourage premieres (premiered?) this week.  So, to help you get ready, here is a look back at the hottest girls from seasons one through seven.
• I must say, it is not very often that someone can upstage Kate Upton in a photo shoot.
• If you are in Boston and have seen the Stanley Cup, please notify Nathan Horton's wife.  She would like to have her day with the Cup. 
• Let us all hope that the second time is the charm for the LAPD.
• Seattle only lost by a touchdown?  Wow, looks like Pete Carroll has that team headed in . . . What is that you say? Wrong football? Oh.
• If you are interested in carrying Tiger's woods and balls, he is hiring.
• Hey Lute, ever heard of a little thing I like to call karma?
• There is nothing like a good, judicial verbal lashing that makes me proud to be an attorney.
• You stay classy, parents of twelve-year-old softball players.
• Speaking of softball, remember that one time Meatloaf was a softball coach?

Well, it appears that many of you enjoyed the video-heavy Link Dump we went with last week.  So, we figured, why not do it again?  After all, there are quite a few videos out there that we did not get a chance to post during our summer vacation.  So, here is another extra-large dose of videos for your viewing pleasure:

• A time-lapse video that is almost too beautiful to be real.  But it is.
• It was only a matter of time before Jim and Alec's rivalry affected innocent bystanders.
• I feel like Steve Nash and I would have a lot of fun together if we were friends.  Steve, consider this an open invitation.
• Chad Reed is rested and recovered after . . . oops . . . might need some more rest and recovery.
• A little rough on the landing, might have to settle for the bronze . . .
• . . . which means this guy might be out of medal contention altogether.
• The answer is no, you are not smarter than a fifth grader.
• It is nice to see J.T. feign humility for at least two second.
• Something tells me Susan Hendricks does not need dolls to mimic that.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Oh, Hello There

Howdy strangers.  Did you miss us?  It sure seems like it has been a while.  What? What is that you say? It has been TWO MONTHS?!?!?!  Yikes.  My bad.

First and foremost, allow me to apologize for the unexplained shutdown of GameTime, TBD© for the past two months.  Not to make excuses (cue the excuses), but a lot has gone done around the offices over the past two months.  There is a possible announcement looming on the horizon that will likely have a dramatic impact on our little corner of the world wide web, and, while things remain in limbo, I did not want to hold out on you, my avid readers, any longer.  When you mix holding out for a final decision to be made with actual work and the various holidays, you get two months of silence around these parts.  But we are back up and running at full speed for the indefinite future, and I will obviously, as I always do, keep you all in the loop if and when any developments actually occur.

Yes, I know that does not necessarily make up for two months of radio silence, not even a sympathy post featuring a picture of an attractive female celebrity, but I do hope you will find it in your hearts to forgive me.

Before we get to the goods [Editor's Note: that's what she said!], I wanted to briefly update you on a couple of topics:

• The Boston Red Sox kick-off the "second half" of their season tonight with a 55-35 record and holding a game-and-a-half lead over the New York Yankees in the American League East.  After starting the season 2-10, Boston remembered they were supposed to win a lot of games this season and started doing just that.  And that has been great for my little "science experiment".  At the start of play today (read: pre-bet), my co-scientist and I were up $329.77 on the season.  But things did not always look so pretty.  We reached a season low $-123.43 on April 15th after a 7-6 loss to the Toronto Blue Jays.  From there, we did not reach positive figures until a 15-5 win over the Chicago Cubs on May 20th.  After bouncing back and forth between positive and negative territory for the next few games, we have remained in the green since an 8-6 win over the Oakland A's on June 3rd.  Since then, it has been a steady climb to current season-high of $329.77.  You may be asking how I know all of this.  Well, I can be a little anal retentive, so I have a complex spreadsheet tracking everything.  Shocking, I know.
• I am a fan of smart television; that is why most of the shows I grow to love get canceled before they should.  Since the main networks prefer to pander to the lowest common denominator, shows like Sports Night, Life, Veronica Mars, Studio 60, Friday Night Lights, and Freaks and Geeks do not survive (the average-American viewer is too dumb to understand them . . . yeah, I went there).  Which brings me to the Women's World Cup (totally saw that one coming, right?).  Perhaps the smartest thing ESPN has ever done (more on this below) was to bring Ian Darke in as their main soccer play-by-play man.  Why is that you ask?  Well, not only is Mr. Darke a genius with his calls (see, e.g., (1) "Oh, it's INCREDIBLE!"; (B) "It is an AB-solute FIRECRACKER . . ."; (iii) "CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS?"; and (d) and the always simple, "It's a GOAL!"), but he is actually a genius.  He displays his intelligence through his word choice and dry sense of humor, or "Darkeisms".  If you actually listen to the things he says throughout the course of the game (like when the ball is just being passed around the midfield), I guarantee you will laugh at least a half-dozen times, probably more.  For example, only a few short minutes before Abby Wambach scored possibly the most dramatic goal in U.S. Soccer history (sorry Landycakes) against Brazil, with the ball out of play and U.S defender Ali Krieger desperately trying to retrieve it, Darke dropped this classic "Darkeism": "The ball went out of play there, and a retinue of intellectuals decided they'd hand it around among themselves before throwing it back." Legen . . . wait for it . . . wait for it . . . dary.
  
• I am going to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows: Part 2 tonight . . . yeah, you read that correctly.

Anyways, I apologize again for the delay in getting things back up and running.  So, without further adieu, I present to you our first Link Dump in two months to help get you through your Friday:

• In non-sports related news, for all you beer lovers out there, here are some ideas for your next vacation . . . 
• . . . and, apparently Groupon does things a little differently over in Europe.
• Sports Illustrated put together a list of the Top 100 sports-related twitter feeds not named @GameTimeTBD that you should be following.
• ESPN, raising the bar of the stupid decisions since 2011.
• But what about "Always pay cash"?
• Your feel-good story of the week comes from the (sing it Dre!) city of Compton.
• You expect me to believe that a guy with nearly a billion dollars in the bank and who is making at least $20 million in endorsements is possibly running out of money?  Right.
• "Reagan Kennedy says she's now working toward her ultimate golf goal - beating her father."  Daddy issues already?
• Dear Lord, not another Hopoate-style incident.  And for those of you now asking "What the [censored] is "Netball"?", here you go.

I am taking a calculated risk with this week's Link Dump return: less articles, more videos.  What do you think?  I figured it is the end of a long summer week, you are tired, and likely do not want to waste time reading things.  So why not go heavy with videos?  You will thank me later:

• With an assist from the bikini-clad smokeshows in the pool.
• Dear Dude, Can you please stop singing?  There is an attractive woman working the pole behind you.  Kthxbye.
• Things Dwyane Wade loses to: (1) the Dallas Mavericks; (b) basketball nets; (iii) six-year-old basketball players even when he tries to abuse his height advantage.
• We are not Giants fans here at GameTime, TBD©, but know a good number of our readers are.  So, to them, here is a reminder that The Franchise: A Season with the San Francisco Giants premiered this week on Showtime.
• Ever wonder what happens when you let Real Madrid practice at UCLA?
• Could this video have been the breakthrough in NFL labor negotiations?
• What is a talk show host to do if he accidentally books two comedians for the same night?  Follow Conan's lead.
• Wedding entrance fail? Wedding entrance fail.
• First Justin Bieber and now Rebecca Black?  How else would you expect him to respond?

It feels good to be back.  Have a great weekend everyone!

Blogosphere, We Have a Problem

It is going to have to be quick and dirty today.  [Editor's Note: that's what she said!]  Our problems are two fold: (1) Blogger, the site which hosts the greatest blog ever created . . . or what you call GameTime, TBD©, had flat-lined for most of the morning, only recently being shocked back to life (yup, I definitely watched too much of last night's Grey's Anatomy); (B) actual work reared its ugly head yesterday in the worst kind of way and has left us with a very short window to provide you, our dear readers, with a short Link Dump to help you through your Friday.

Thankfully all is not lost.  Some genius at Esquire magazine said to some other genius at Esquire magazine, "You know, I haven't seen Marisa Miller in a sexy photo shoot in a while."  So said second genius replied, "We should get her to do one."  And you know what?  They did:

It was if the Gods of the blogosphere knew things were not going to end well for us this week, so they blessed us with Marisa in all her glory.  Not only that, but Marisa finally jumped on the Twitter bandwagon this week and let us know that this is one of her all-time favorite pictures of herself.  Well played Marisa, well played.

And, of course, we all need a few good laughs on Fridays, especially Fridays like this.  And again, the Gods of the blogosphere came through for us:

• It is time to play "Count the Sexual Innuendos".  We will set the clock at 3:51.  Ready . . . GO!
• Well, it is Friday and, you know, you gotta get down on Friday.
• In N' Out is bringing tears  . . . and obesity . . . but mostly tears . . . to the people of Texas.
• That is just Roger being Roger . . . except the whole losing the match part.
• Ten points to the Rockies' announcers who spend the first thirty seconds of this video ball-washing the grounds crew.
• This is what the American League is doing to the Chief and his little "science experiment".
• Really? REALLY?

Have a great weekend everyone!

Never Mix Your Downers and Your Uppers

We have on good authority that the Chief has finally come to terms with end of the Los Angeles Kings' season and is finally ready to get things back up and running at full speed here in the GameTime, TBD© offices.  As such, we spent the better part of Wednesday and Thursday bouncing around ideas for the introduction for this week's Link Dump.  And, obviously, the topic we kept coming back to is the death of Osama bin Laden.  Now, we, like everyone else, are ready to never hear that man's name uttered ever again, but with his death, and the subsequent news coverage, we have all been reminded of just how far reaching the impact of September 11th was.  And, so we thought we would take this opportunity to share one of the many sports-related stories you may not have heard before.

Whenever someone attends their first Los Angeles Kings' game at the Staples Center, a lot of times you hear them ask this question: "Why is the Kings' mascot named Bailey?"  I am not surprised by the question; Bailey does seem like an odd name for a lion (the King of beasts) mascot.  I am more surprised with how few Kings fans actually know the answer.  So here we go:

Garnet "Ace" Bailey won two Stanley Cups with the Boston Bruins (1970 and 1972).  But his real impact in the NHL came from his career after his playing days, as a scout.  His keen eye for talent helped build the great Edmonton Oilers' dynasty of the mid-to-late 1980s.  During his time in Edmonton, he had become a mentor and close friend to the NHL's greatest ambassador, Wayne Gretzky.  In 1994, he was hired by the Kings to serve as their Director of Pro Scouting, a position he held until 2001.

On a warmer-than-average September morning in Boston, Massachusetts, Ace Bailey and fellow-Kings scout Mark Bavis meet at Logan International Airport in preparation for their flight to Los Angeles for the start of the Kings' training camp and the beginning of the season.  They board their flight with fifty-four other passengers, push back from the gate at 7:58 a.m., and officially depart for Los Angeles at 8:14 a.m.  Unfortunately, Bailey and Bavis will never make it to Los Angeles.  That is because, at the direction of Osama bin Laden, five hijackers will take over United Airlines flight 175 and, at 9:03 a.m., with the world watching live on television, fly the plane into the South Tower of the World Trade Center.

Since the President announced that the U.S. had finally tracked down and killed the most wanted in the world last Sunday, news organizations far and wide began tracking down both survivors and the families of those who lost their life in the attacks of September 11th, to get their response to news.  ESPN's Scott Burnside had the opportunity to catch up with the Bailey family, who have carried on Ace's legacy through a foundation helping children battling serious illnesses.  Burnside also took the time to catch up with current-Washington Capitals head coach Bruce Boudreau, who, at the time, was the head coach of the Kings' AHL affiliate in Manchester, New Hampshire and had his own connection to Bailey.  And for those of us who cheer on the Kings every season, we are reminded of Garnet "Ace" Bailey with the presence of a lion, the Kings' mascot Bailey.

I am not going to lie, there are exactly zero good ways to transition from a story of 9/11 to the entertaining part of the Link Dump, the links.  I will say this, if you have not been following this year's Stanley Cup Playoffs, you have been missing out on the best playoffs of recent memory, games that are head and shoulders ahead of anything the NBA can produce in terms of drama and excitement.  Seriously, I can not recommend strongly enough that you try to check out some of the action this weekend.  I promise it will be worth your time.  Speaking of worth your time:

• Men in green tights have not been this entertaining since Mel Brooks did his thing.  So, NHL, stop trying to ruin a good thing.
• Please add "Wayne Gretzky Rookie Card" to your "Things That Are Recession Proof" list.
• Flutie did it! Flutie did it!
• What? Police using racial profiling? Get right out of town.
• Just a friendly reminder that, while the First Amendment gives you the right to speak your mind freely, it does not protect you from the consequences of exercising that right poorly.
• Only with the Browns. 
• "We're not moving to Toronto." But Los Angeles sure is nice in the winter.
• Heartbreak city.
• For the talent portion of the competition, Miss Michigan will demonstrate her skill with a blade.
• Your "Horrible Person of the Week" award goes to . . . 
• Anyone know when Amazon.com will be accepting pre-orders for this one? 
• The biggest mover up my list of favorite sports is cricket; twenty-fifth and climbing.  [Editor's Note: make sure you enjoy the audio portion of the story.]

The video portion of the Link Dump is always an interesting process.  Some weeks the idiots stay home so we have to dig through our archives for yet-to-be-shown entertaining videos.  Other weeks it is like there is an idiot convention on the internet and every one is rushing to one-up each other with videos.  Well, thankfully for you, this week was the latter of the two:

• Nut shot + "I pooped myself a little" = #WINNING.  [Editor's Note: normally nut shots don't require sound to be entertaining . . . watch this one without sound first, and then discover how it is eleventy billion times funnier with sound.]
• I like a man who is not afraid to put his money kidney where his mouth is.
• At what point, exactly, does one come to the decision that it is a good idea to get in front of a snowmobile rolling down a hill?  1:35 apparently  . . .
• Security guard, FTW!
• Pull-up Bar 1, Jag-Bag Trainer 0.
• You have to be awfully confident in your job performance to pull off this office prank.
• Smashville, population camera guy.
• I thought I heard a Rebecca Black reference in Obama's speech last Sunday.
• Is it lazy of us to post Jimmy Kimmel's "This Week in Unnecessary Censorship" every week?  Probably.  Will we stop? [Censored] no!

Have a great weekend everyone!